Moonbrains 2: Khonsu City
by Isis Magic
Summary: Set two years after the BDM, during the 2nd war for Independence. Rayne. Featuring mayhem and a Browncoat Underground. Finally finished! Please review! Special thanks to all for the support and patience!
1. Chapter 1

Moonbrains: Khonsu City

Chapter 1

Jayne couldn't hear over the gun blasts. Tanks were rolling along, firing their missiles at the enemy while warships buzzed overhead begging for notice. Jayne was on the big gun. He called her Amelia. She was a pretty anti-aircraft piece circa the first war. Reclaimed from an Alliance weapons collector and cleaned up nice for her comeback tour.

Mal was barking orders to hold the line, but Jayne barely heard him. Always the same orders out here near the black. Hold the line and maybe the Alliance will give up this time.

The only reason they ever did give up was River. Where was that girl?

Just as he was thinking it, River ran up from the front. She looked so different than the moonbrained kid who led them to Miranda. Long brown coat, armor showing through her worn T-shirt. Pants instead of a skirt. Boots over her normally bare feet. A warrior instead of a girl.

Jayne saw rather than heard her tell Mal something, probably something that would change the tide of the whole battle. Hell, maybe this time it would even change the tide of the whole war. Where to shoot. And when. That was River's forte.

Mal called for Zoe. Zoe played on the radio. Jayne kept shooting.

River was on her way towards him when an enemy craft, small, fast, and deadly, swooped low and began firing. Jayne fired back, hit it, and watched it crash into the mountainside. He turned back to smile cockily at River, but she was lying on the ground, blood pooling around her.

"Jayne!" River's voice over the intercom woke him up. Jayne snapped up and fell out of bed. "You should be more careful," River said sweetly as Jayne muttered to himself in Chinese. "Come up to the bridge. We're orbiting Khonsu."

Heart still pumping from his dream, Jayne shakily got up, dressed, and quickly made his way to the bridge. Mal gave him a curious look as Jayne entered and crossed the floor to stand behind River's seat.

"Having nightmares of terrifying space monkeys, Jayne?" Mal asked.

"Rabbits," Jayne said. "Scary little fur-covered monsters." Mal laughed. River looked up at Jayne, giving him the "I know you're lying, but I'm going to let you get away with it at the moment," look. "Thought you said this was a moon."

"Well, it ain't," Mal said.

"Orbital pattern is irregular. Looks like a moon part of the year. Looked like a moon when they named it," River said, tilting her head as she looked out the window.

"Why ain't we landing?" Jayne asked. "Don't fit that we're just orbitin'."

"Waiting for word from Monty. They've got a safe spot for us, just don't know where it is yet."

"Why ain't they done told ya before?"

"It changes," River said simply.

River looked out the window, wondering what in the hell kind of work Monty could have for them on this gorram too-close-to-the-core-for-comfort planet. From what Jayne could see, the planet was all city. In Jayne's experience, there was a dark look to planets like that, planets been terra-formed then cut up to make cities. Didn't look like a proper New Earth no more. Planets like this were cold, heartless, with nothing left of the natural world. Planets like this made Jayne's skin crawl. Too many factories and buildings. Too many humans all crowded together. Too many -

"Schools," River muttered, interrupting Jayne's thoughts. She looked back up at Jayne. "Khonsuians like their schools."

The screen bleeped. River hit a button. A woman's face appeared. She was about Zoe's age, with a hard look to her, like Zoe on the battlefield. All serious business. The woman had brown hair up in a tight bun and piercing green eyes. If she didn't look so shrewish, Jayne would have thought she looked kinda pretty. River twitched.

"Captain Reynolds?" the woman asked, looking at Jayne with a confused expression.

"Hell no," Jayne answered.

Mal pushed him out of the way and began to cover, "No, ma'am. Serenity is no longer owned by Captain Reynolds. I'm Captain Smith."

"Cut the crap, Mal," the woman said. "Monty sends his best, but he's been unavoidably detained on another mission." She paused. "We're going on without him. It was never really Monty who was in charge. And we've been waiting too gorram long on this planet for an endgame gonna be worth all this sneaking around."

"So the rumors are true then? Well, ain't that shiny?"

"What rumors?" Jayne asked River, his voice low.

"Browncoat underground has all but taken over Khonsu City."

"Which amounts to taking over the whole planet. Since it is all one big city. One big God-forsaken city."

"Who are you, lady?" Jayne asked.

"Sonja Geller." She paused again. "I'm sending you the location."

"No need, General Geller," River interrupted. "I know where you want us to go."

"Speaking of rumors being true. Shiny," Geller said. "See you planet-side, then."

The screen bleeped back off.

"River?" Mal asked.

"You always say I shouldn't answer a question that hasn't actually been asked."

"Can we trust her?"

"Monty was never going to meet us here. She just didn't think you'd come if it were anyone else asking." River paused for a moment. "But she's not Alliance. And she needs us. Don't know what for yet, but it's worth a second look. Bit hard being psychic from orbit."

"Well, then. Let's go be good guys," Mal said. "Take us down."

"Never been to a city like Khonsu before," Kaylee said, helping Jayne load the new mule, which was actually a worse wreck than the old mule, but at least it wasn't in a hundred pieces on a valley floor on Achilles. "Simon says it ain't like Ariel. Just enough of the black to make it a bit wild." They had just landed, and already Kaylee was rearing to get off the ship and touch real ground. Jayne knew she hadn't been doing so well the past couple of weeks. He tried awfully hard not to think about why.

"Khonsu City is just like every other core city. Big, shiny, and full of folk who don't care about anybody but themselves. Which is precisely why they didn't see the Browncoats comin'," Mal muttered, opening the airlock.

Jayne rechecked all his weapons before taking a step outside. His first impulse was to ask how anybody could actually breathe on this gorram planet. "What the hell is that?" he asked, coughing.

Kaylee retreated, taking the stairs toward Inara's shuttle, as River came down. "We're in the outskirts of Section One. It's a chemical recycling plant. Biggest one in the core."

"What, did they build this one and then decide it was too awful to try for any more so close to civilization?" Mal asked, his face contorted.

"Something like that," River nodded.

"Let's just get to the rendezvous," Mal said. "Kaylee!" he bellowed back into the ship.

From far off, Kaylee answered, "I'm comin', Captain! Not to fret!"

Inara, stepping into view, shook her head. "No, she's not coming," she said.

Mal sighed, shaking his head. "All right. You're staying on the ship. Simon, too," Mal said to Inara. He turned to walk out of the ship, spotted Jayne, and pointed at him. "You, too."

"What do ya mean, me too what?"

"Stay on the ship."

"With the womenfolk."

"And Simon," Inara said.

"Like I said. With the womenfolk," Jayne repeated.

"I ain't leaving them without protection. You stay on the ship. Closer her up, don't go sticking your nose anywhere. Just keep everyone out of trouble until we find out what we're here for."

Jayne exchanged a look with River as he walked back into the ship. He didn't want her to go alone. The last part of his dream came back to him. If anything happened to her -

River blinked at him, like she'd just realized something. Maybe she really hadn't known what his dream actually was about. Maybe she'd just known Jayne wasn't really afraid of bunny rabbits.

"Your fears are not rational," River stated, still staring at him.

"Generally speaking, Moonbrain, fear ain't supposed to be rational," Jayne retorted.

Zoe put an arm around River and started pulling her along behind Mal, who was now headed for the mule. "We won't be long, Jayne. Don't get any ideas about the ship."

"Don't worry. If he took it now, he'd be stuck with Simon." River stopped. She turned around, another surprised look etched on her face.

He wasn't no mind-reading genius, but Jayne was pretty sure what River was scared of. Jayne had been successfully avoiding being alone in a room with Simon since they all left Achilles. Now, Jayne supposed, he was out of places to hide and definitely out of excuses to run. In short, Jayne was humped.

Jayne stepped back into the hold, watching Mal drive away, Zoe riding shotgun and River in the back. He closed the door and turned around to find Simon staring at him from the overpass. He had those freakin' stupid sunglasses on, and it seemed to Jayne he was trying to hard to be a badass. "Doc," Jayne nodded at him, making his way up the stairs.

"I think it's time we had a talk, Jayne."

There was a reason Jayne never met their parents. Older brothers, he was beginning to realize, were even worse.

"About what, Simon?" Jayne asked, moving past him and heading for the kitchen.

"About my sister," Simon said, blocking Jayne's path.

"Ah, Simon. You better not talk about her behind her back. She'll find out, and then she'll kill you with her brain," Jayne said teasingly. Simon stared at him. "What do you want me to say? That we're just friends?"

"I'm really not in the mood to be lied to."

Jayne backed away slightly at his tone, then hated himself for it. This was Simon. _Simon_. Why the hell should he explain himself to Simon? What could he do to him?

That's when Simon remembered Ariel, and the Lassiter heist, and the infirmary table. And the first time River threatened to kill him with her brain. Okay, so maybe there was a lot Simon could do to him, given the right circumstances.

"Nor am I in the mood for any sort of details or explanation," Simon said, putting up a hand as Jayne was about to say that he and River were sleeping together. Jayne was glad he hadn't actually gotten that far in the sentence. "And I know you're intentions cannot be honorable, so I won't even ask."

Jayne was offended. "I got all sorts of honor."

Simon just looked at him.

"Well, I don't got any dishonor. Not with regards to River, anyway."

Simon shook his head. "I just wanted to make something clear. If you hurt her, assuming of course she doesn't get to you before I can, you will wish the Reavers had gotten a hold of you on Miranda." He locked eyes with Jayne. "Because if you hurt her, and she goes back to the black, all bets are off. Hippocrates or no Hippocrates."

Simon stared at him for a full minute just to let Jayne know he was serious before he turned and walked off down the corridor. Jayne was left on the overpass wondering who the hell Hippocrates was. He was pretty sure, though, that Simon meant to kill him if anything happened to River.

All in all, it seemed fair enough to Jayne. He'd killed a man for hurting his sister once. And he'd do it again.

"I think it's sweet," Kaylee said from behind him.

Jayne turned and raised an eyebrow, "Sweet? It's sweet that your baby-daddy wants to kill me?"

"No, it's sweet about you and River."

Jayne gave her his best, "I still don't know what you're talking about" look. It was one he'd perfected over the years of pretending to be a complete moron.

"It's been obvious for a while that you care about River. You're as protective of her as Mal or Simon is! And though it ain't so obvious to _some_ people on this ship," Kaylee smiled sweetly, "River's had a crush on you for years."

Jayne blinked. "She tried to kill me."

"And you tried to kill her," Kaylee said in a "What's your point?" kind of tone. "Anyway," she continued, "I'm happy for you. Finally got yourself a woman who can handle you."

Jayne was about to take offense to being handled by anyone, but, even he had to admit, he rather enjoyed being handled by River. Out loud he said, "Finally got me a Moonbrain, is what you mean, Kaylee."

"Same thing. A woman's got to be a bit of a moonbrain to be with you, Jayne." With that she swooped around him and went off toward the engine room.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter Two

River rode along in the back of the new mule and watched the dirty side of Khonsu City roll by beside her. This was not the average Core planet. Or maybe it was, and River didn't know it. Maybe every shiny place was hiding a corner that looked just like this, the corner of the closet where you shoved things to forget about them. They had passed the chemical plant, but the smell had actually gotten worse. Instead of chemicals, River now smelled people. Sweat and sewage, and as the passed one alley in particular, sex.

"When we get there, let me do the talking. Remember what I said about new people," Mal was saying.

He was worried the Browncoats would be scared of River. It was always hard to judge how people would react to an honest to God mind reading psychic. And the one who basically started the second war. Not that any of them blamed her. Much.

"You hearin' me, River?"

When was she not hearing him?

"Yes, Captain. Don't scare the Browncoat Underground by letting them know I know all their deepest darkest secrets. I got it." River turned her attention to all the different people suddenly in the street as the Captain finally steered them onto a main road. She caught glimpses of their thoughts as they drove past. It always amazed her what random people on the street were thinking of. How some of them didn't even know big things were happening in the universe. They just wanted to get to work on time, or get real food at the store for once. River sat back for a few moments, closed her eyes, and listened.

"Damn new recruits are gonna eat us outta base."

"Where did I put that gorram key?"

"Pieces of shit Browncoats got no long term plan. I don't care if they _are_ better than the gorram Alliance. They gotta get their shit together and get this gorram war over with."

"Can't forget to pick up that new converter on the way home. Can't forget. Can't forget."

"This can't be right. Mamma's gotta be losing her gorram mind. No way Jayne would go back to Achilles. Not for nothing."

River snapped up in her seat, looking around for him, but she couldn't find Jayne's brother in the crowd.

"You all right, Little One?" Zoe asked.

"Fine," River said, letting the subject drop.

"Keep your ears open, little Albatross. I don't know what this Heller woman wants with us, and that doesn't quite sit right with me."

"Geller."

"What's that?"

"Her name is Sonja Geller."

"Whatever. I've never heard of her before today."

"That's why I'm still alive, Captain Reynolds," a woman said, coming up beside the mule as Mal slowed to let a truck go through an intersection. "You, however, have quite a reputation. Such a reputation as to make us all think you'd be a fantastic party guest."

River looked at Sonja, tilted her head, and tried to get a read on her. It was going to be difficult. Sonja had a lot on her mind. She was prioritizing all her thoughts, taking things one step of a time. River couldn't quite see the endgame yet.

"If you would follow me," Sonja said, motioning behind her. "Anton over yonder will watch out for your – er – whatever this thing is."

Mal tensed ever so slightly. River knew why, though she didn't actually understand it. Mal knew the new mule was a piece of crap. Why was he offended when someone else alluded to the fact? Oh, right. Because it was _his_ piece of crap.

River followed Mal and Zoe, who followed Sonja into an office building. They were in a slightly better part of town now, though just slightly. On the way in, River realized everyone they passed was a Browncoat. It was true, then, that the Underground of Khonsu City had more power than anyone thought.

Sonja led them to an elevator, which took them to the top floor. The floor was mostly comprised of cubicles, with a few private offices along the outer edges. As Sonja led them further on, office workers stood up and openly gawked at River and Mal. River was impressed with the war room. To anyone who wasn't psychic it would look just like the Browncoats wanted it to look.

"What is it you are supposed to be doing here exactly?" Mal asked. His distaste for the Browncoat Underground's spy games was beginning to show in his voice.

"Publishing. Comic books," River stated.

Sonja glanced back at her, raising an eyebrow. "That's right. We look like a publishing house."

"Comic books?" Zoe asked.

Sonja shrugged. "Graphic novels are always awesome."

River stifled a laugh. Mal glanced behind him to glare at her.

Sonja led them to a private conference room. "Beauty of Khonsu. No one looks too close. Not even our friends on Thoth."

For two months every year, the unusual orbit of Khonsu brought the planet so close to Thoth that some people still claimed Khonsu was actually a moon of the core planet. The other ten months, however, Khonsu was so far from Thoth that most people said it had to be its own planet. River actually didn't care which was correct.

Sonja took a seat at the head of the table. Mal and Zoe sat to her left. River remained standing behind them. She already didn't like this place. Too many secrets to eat away at her brain.

A man entered the room and took a seat opposite Mal. River decided right away she didn't like this man. He was tall and built. He was rough. Rougher than Jayne. He had a scar on his neck from a bullet wound some years back. He was dark, too dark. Had seen too many dark things. He'd fought in the first war.

"Who are you, then? A writer?" Mal asked.

"Geming Smith. Second in Command. Welcome to the Browncoat Underground of Khonsu City."

"Not very underground," she stated, looking out at the view of the city. She was looking at the shiny side of the city now. It looked more like the core she knew.

Mal shot her a look. River shrugged. Then she almost laughed. Maybe the Captain was right. Maybe Jayne's attitude was starting to rub off on River.

"It's a building," Geming said. "It serves its purpose. We could have done worse."

"How many people you got here, anyhow?" Mal asked.

"We don't rightly know," Sonja admitted. "Not like we keep a ledger of everyone's names. Best we can figure, the slums are with us. Get deeper into the better part of the city, more like you'll find about half and half Alliance to Browncoats."

"Harder to see the dark in all the shiny lights," River said, looking out at the city again. That was when River got her first glance of it. She saw it in Sonja's mind just as she spotted it in the city itself. A tower of glass. Their reason for being secret. A doctor who couldn't do it any more.

"We plan to take over the planet before we pass Thoth's orbit."

"You only have nine months. Are you really ready for that?" River asked. Mal was now getting angry with her.

"In nine months, we'll be just a skip away from Thoth. Perfect time to launch the Underground at them."

"Using gravity to your advantage," River said, nodding. Mal sighed. He was deciding to give up glaring at her, as his disapproving looks had not stopped her from talking.

"We're likely to use anything to our advantage, little girl. Or did you miss the fact we're at war?" Geming asked.

"Did you forget that little discussion we had earlier about respect, Smith?" Sonja asked, glaring at him. Smith scowled in response.

"Sounds like a fine plan. Surely it does. Don't see how we can make it any better," Mal stated.

Sonja slid a few data cards to Mal. Blueprints and other intelligence describing what the locals simply called The Tower.

"Alliance stronghold of some kind?" Zoe asked, looking over Mal's shoulder at the cards.

Sonja was concentrating awfully hard on not looking at River. Like River had to look at her to know what she was thinking.

"An Academy of some kind," River stated, making Mal look up at her again. She held his gaze. She wasn't going to hold anything inside. Not in this place where secrets multiplied like rabbits.

"So what?" Mal asked, deliberately playing the fool. "I hear all the smart ones are joining our side."

Geming snorted. "Not that kind of Academy, Captain. The kind of Academy that experiments on people's brains and turns 'em into weapons of mass destruction and chaos. Or worse, turns 'em into witches and mind readers."

Sonja glared at him, wanting to smack him in the head. River did not blame her. She wanted to hit Geming Smith, too. "We've got word from a doctor on the inside. They've got about twenty-five high profile students in there, plus operatives and personnel running security in the place. It's a fortress."

"Would appear you've got a little snag in your original plan," Mal offered.

"Just a little one," Sonja said, taking the cards back.

"Still don't see what you want us to do about it," Mal said. It wasn't real until she asked. It was just a hunch until she actually said it. And Mal was going to make her say it.

"We need your crew's help liberating the students the Alliance ahs hidden away in the Tower of Khonsu," Sonja said calmly.

"Unless, of course, the great and legendary crew of the Serenity isn't up for the challenge," Geming said.

"It's just Serenity," River pointed out.

"Who says we would be interested? Seems to me, we've already had our share of liberating Alliance Academy students."

"Come on, Captain," Sonja said. "No one else has ever successfully gotten a student out, much less turned one back into a normal human being."

River supposed she should take that as a compliment.

"Not only did Simon Tam get his sister out, but then you kept her safe from Blue Hands and Alliance Bounty Hunters, your own untrustworthy contacts on various shady planets, and one bad ass and insanely loyal Alliance Operative."

Geming held up a finger as he made his own point, "And, in the meantime, you ripped off an Alliance hospital. Not to mention the whole Niska thing."

"We really are legendary."

"Captain, there are poems and songs," Sonja said. "So you see why we chose you to help."

"You're lying," River stated.

"River," Mal started, in his best warning voice.

"It's okay," Sonja said. "We did leave one qualifier out of your long list of skills that make you ideal for this job." Sonja paused. "You've got River Tam. Who better to free other students than then Alliance's former star pupil?"

So that was it then. Mal had River. Mal had a not-so-secret weapon.

"I'll have to talk to my crew," Mal said. He was thinking of Kaylee. And Inara. He didn't think now was the time for thrilling heroics. But he would have said yes. Right then. Right there. If Kaylee and Inara would be guaranteed safe, he would have signed them all up for it.

"What's there to talk about? You're the Captain, ain't ya?" Geming asked angrily.

"I understand," Sonja said after swiftly kicking her second in command under the table. "It's risky. Reopens old wounds and doors perhaps better left closed. We've got a place set up for your ship, a real hanger, not a spot by a dump." Sonja handed Mal a disc. "Heard one of your crew can't abide the chem. plant smell. Can't blame her there. Take a day or two, think it over. I think we'll be able to come to an arrangement. You do have a reputation for doing the right thing, Captain Reynolds." Sonja rose from her chair. "Yet another reason we thought you'd be perfect for this job."

Mal, Zoe, and River saw themselves out. Mal pushed the emergency stop button in the elevator on the way back down. Zoe turned on a jamming device so they knew no one was listening in. "Reason you couldn't wait until we were back on the ship, sir?" Zoe asked, annoyed she had to use her new toy for a conversation that would no doubt be repeated.

"What happened to just listening?" Mal asked River. She shrugged. "When I give an order, I expect it to be followed."

"If you honestly think you can make me do anything I don't want to do, Captain, you are sorely mistaken," River said angrily. He would have done it. Without even asking her. Without asking any of the crew. He thought he had a right to risk all their lives.

"You never used to act like this," Mal said, shaking his head.

"You are seriously going to blame Jayne?" River asked.

Mal mumbled something about split loyalties.

River cursed at him in Chinese and said, "We wouldn't even be here if it weren't for me. I'm the one they really want. I'm the one they think they need."

"You just don't call a gorram General a liar like that!"

"No more secrets," River said.

"Fine, but you could have waited. Told me later. Give me a little leverage on her."

River shook her head angrily and punched the elevator button. As they started moving again, she said, "You already have leverage on her, Captain. You have me."

"Do I?" Mal asked. The elevator stopped, the doors opened, and Mal stomped ahead, leaving River glaring at his back for a few minutes, wishing she really could kill him with her brain.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter Three

Inara was just settling down to a nice, calming cup of tea when there was a soft knock on the shuttle door. "Come in, Kaylee," Inara called, recognizing her friend's knock immediately.

"Huh-huh-hi!" Kaylee gasped through nearly hysterical tears.

Inara jumped up, put a comforting arm around Kaylee, an dled her to the sofa. "What's wrong, sweetie?" she asked, handing Kaylee a handkerchief.

Through many more tears and gasping for breath, Kaylee told Inara that Simon had just proposed to her. Or, Inara was pretty sure that's what Kaylee meant. There was an awful lot of blubbering going on.

"But, sweetie, isn't that a good thing? I mean, you've been wanting him to propose for so long now."

Kaylee scowled at her. "No like this!" she exclaimed.

"Not like what? Sweetie, would you like some tea? It will help you relax." Inara poured Kaylee a cup without waiting for a response.

"I don't need to relax!" Kaylee yelled, jumping up. Silence ensued for a few moments. Then Kaylee sank back into the sofa and starting crying again. "It was supposed to be all romantic. He'd do something special and get down on one knee and say he couldn't bear the thought of living without me in his life and would I do him the great honor of being his wife." Kaylee sniffed. "Was that too much to ask?"

Inara thought it sounded pretty basic, but she decided to keep silent. Even agreeing with Kaylee seemed dangerous at this point.

"I didn't think so! Not too much to ask at all! I mean, for as long as I waited for him - "

Inara nodded. Not that Kaylee was paying any attention to her.

"And what do I get? What do I get as a marriage proposal? Certainly not the romantic one I had coming to me after two years with that idiot!" Kaylee cried.

Inara figured as much, considering Kaylee's current state. She ventured forth from her silence, trying, "How bad could it have been?"

"Pfft," Kaylee huffed. "It's Simon."

Oh. So, pretty bad, then. Aloud, Inara dared to ask, "What exactly did he say?"

"'Kaylee, with a baby coming, we really ought to consider doing the right thing by him or her and getting married,'" Kaylee said in a mocking tone.

Inara would have laughed, but Kaylee's waterworks had started again.

"Like he couldn't bear to marry me except it was the right thing to do since he knocked me up!" Kaylee said through her latest batch of tears.

"Sweetie, he loves you, you know that."

"He's an ass!"

"Yes, but an ass who really does love you," Inara tried. "I'm sure he had planned to propose in a more romantic way - "

"Well, it's too late now!" Kaylee interrupted. "'Cause I told that moonbrained stuck up doctor the he can - " here Kaylee shot off in some very colorful Chinese.

Inara took a sip of her tea and let Kaylee calm down. After a few minutes, she handed Kaylee back her cup. Kaylee took it this time. As Kaylee sipped her tea, Inara rubbed her back. She didn't know what to tell her friend. She was sure Simon hadn't meant to sound like a complete idiot. That's just how he ended up sounding when he was trying to talk to Kaylee about something important. Inara kept silent on the subject at the moment, though, because as much as she liked Simon, she didn't think a defense of the young doctor was what Kaylee needed to hear at this precise moment. They must have sat there for half an hour, Kaylee drinking her tea and Inara rubbing her back and playing with her hair.

"All crew to the kitchen, please," River's voice sang across the intercom.

"They're back already?" Kaylee asked.

"That certainly didn't take very long," Inara said. Suddenly she had a bad feeling about the kind of mission they were getting themselves into here. Ten minutes later, after listening to Mal explain what the Browncoat Underground wanted them to do, her fears were realized.

"Nice place to set up a Browncoat Underground," Jayne muttered. "Right next door to an Alliance Assassin Academy. Might as well be 'cross the road from a weapons factory rigged to explode."

River was being oddly quiet and was especially avoiding Jayne's eyes. The mercenary obviously didn't like this idea. (Inara doubted any of the crew actually liked this idea.) But behind Jayne's normal "Are you insane?" expression, Inrara sensed a deep concern fro River. This mission, after all, would be incredibly dangerous for her.

"You really want us to do this? Attack an Alliance Academy?" Simon asked.

"Aren't you all about doing the right thing?" Kaylee asked bitterly. Simon looked away.

Mal looked from one to the other, as if finally noticing that they weren't sitting beside each other. "Whether it's the right thing or not remains to be seen," Mal conceded. "As it is, I ain't ordering any of you to participate in this venture. In fact," he looked at Inara very briefly and then at Kaylee, "there are a couple of you I'm ordering not to set a foot towards the place. It ain't gonna be easy. And it ain't gonna be especially healthy."

Silence.

"We've got a couple of days to think about it," Mal said after a few moments. "They're gonna lead us to a hangar, give us a good welcome. I'll give y'all some time to decide for yourselves." Mal nodded once, then walked out of the kitchen. Quickly, Inara rose and followed him.

"Mal!" Inara called after him.

"Can't I do anything right by you, Inara?" he asked as he spun around. "I lead them into danger, you stand there telling me not to. I leave it up to them whether or not I lead them into danger, and you still follow me to yell at me."

"I didn't follow you to fight, Mal."

"Well, that'll be a first." He met her eyes. She looked away first, hating herself for it. "Why did you follow me?"

"I just, why is this time different? Why didn't you just order them to do things your way, as usual?"

"Because this ain't my way. This is _their _way."

"You don't trust the Browncoats?"

"These are a new breed of Browncoats. Using secrets as weapons. That don't sit right with me. And it don't sit right with River."

Knocking echoed through the ship. Three knocks at a time. Mal gave Inara one last bewildered look before he turned around and walked towards the hold. Inara followed.

River was already at the door, waiting for Mal. "The Browncoats are here to tow the ship to the hangar."

"Tow?"

River opened the door. A young woman about twenty-three years old stood in the doorway, a big smile on her face and a tow-cable in her hand. She was short and thin but looked strong. She wore brown overalls and somehow reminded Inara of Kaylee. Maybe it was the grease stains all over her shirt. "Hi there!" the girl said excitedly, giving a little wave. "I'm Kuan-yin."

"Why not just let us fly her to the hangar?" Mal asked abruptly.

Kuan-yin blinked, fiddling with the tow cable. "Well, Captain, it's not far from here, and it's not so easy to fly in and out of."

"We happen to have a very capable pilot."

Kuan-yin looked around for help. Her eyes landed on River.

"It's underground and secret. They're going to take us there so we can't see the way."

"What's the matter? Don't trust us?" Jayne asked from the catwalk. He was armed in his usual war gear.

Kuan-yin looked up at him. "Jayne Cobb."

"I'm that obvious."

Kuan-yin shrugged. She looked back at Mal. "This is the deal, Captain Reynolds. You can do things our way or you can continue to camp out behind the chemical plant. Your call." She swung the tow cable like a pendulum in front of her as she waited for Mal to answer.

Inara half expected him to say hell with them and their hangar fortress. But a breeze brought the chemical smell inside, and Mal immediately nodded.

"All right then," Kuan-yin said. "Let's get you all to the real Browncoat Underground."

The ride would take half an hour or so. They moved slowly. Kuan-yin sat with the crew in the kitchen, making quick friends with Kaylee.

"Wait until you see the beauty I'm working on in the hangar! Oh, she's a masterpiece!"

"What model is she?"

"Oh, she's got all sorts of stuff in her. Whatever I can Frankenstein together. What I'm aiming for is a Firefly."

"Like my ship, do you?" Mal asked from the head of the table. His arms were crossed and he'd been grumpily staring at the Browncoat since she'd taken a seat at his table.

Kuan-yin looked up and around the kitchen. "She is a beautiful ship. Freedom itself in a metal hull. Doesn't hurt that she'll run forever. Or that I happen to come across the shell of one a year ago."

Kaylee's eyes were glowing as she nodded excitedly.

Mal eased off the stranger now, relaxing his arms. River was sitting next to him, trying to be discrete as she edged closer to Jayne. Inara assumed they were holding hands under the table. Or, maybe not hands. She stopped thinking about it. Mal was pointedly _not_ looking at them. Inara knew he had to be going crazy with the knowing. Ignorance would have been bliss. Ignorance would also have led to Jayne being sucked out of the airlock.

Zoe meanwhile was the only one at the table who looked completely calm, reading a newspaper Kuan-yin had brought with her. Every once in a while, Zoe would shake her head as if in disbelief.

"How long have you been working on it?" Simon asked Kuan-yin.

"Her," Kaylee corrected, glaring.

Simon looked away.

"Oh, two years this time. That shell really got the project off the ground. I'm really cooking now. Every time folks got spare parts they can't make heads nor tails of, they give em straight to me."

"This time?" Jayne asked, as if he'd gotten stuck at the beginning of the sentence.

"I had a collection started back home, but then the war started, and they needed engineers, so I packed on up, left my beauties at home, and went off to war. Every now and then my folks send me a big package of more, but it's getting pretty hard to get post here from the black."

Inara was impressed by her dedication to her hobby, and she told the young woman so.

"Oh, more like an obsession, really. The lads in my unit all tell me I need a man in my life. Would kick the ship right out of my thoughts, they tell me. But I don't think so. Ain't a man alive who's more interesting than my bird."

Everyone laughed. Kaylee nodded her approval again, not meeting Simon's eyes.

The ship stopped. There was a distant cranking noise. Then it felt like they were going down, as if they were on a giant elevator. They stopped again. Now that everyone was quiet, Inara could hear the distant clamps of another set of tow cables. Then the ship lurched slowly forward again. The crew sat in silence. Kuan-yin bobbed her head from side to side as if counting. The ship jerked to another sudden halt about ten minutes later. They'd arrived.

Kuan-yin slapped the table. "Well! I guess you all get to see her for yourselves now! Come on, then! I'll show you around the compound! We've even got special guest quarters for ya'll iffen you don't wanna stay on your ship the whole time. And you'll see right quick why we couldn't just have you land here. And it's _not_ just because we don't trust you." The girl winked at Jayne. River glared for a split second.

Kuan-yin led the way out of the kitchen. Inara was the last to leave. River was waiting for her at the door.

"What's wrong?" Inara asked.

"Mal wants me to do this."

Inara studied her for a moment. "Do what exactly?" With River it was best to check.

"Talk to you about men."

"Mal told you to talk to me about men?" Inara repeated.

"He thinks if you tell me that Jayne is only after one thing, that I'll believe you and dump Jayne before I get hurt."

"He does, does he?"

"Not out loud," River conceded. Inara had thought not. "You convinced the Captain not to kill my mercenary. But he doesn't like us. He wants us to stop."

"You're telling me this so I'll talk to Mal for you?"

"No. I'm talking to you so that when Mal asks you to, you can say that you tried." River paused. "So try."

"To talk you into leaving Jayne?" Inara asked. River nodded. Inara shook her head, deciding to play along. "All right. Fine. River, Jayne is in love with you. So you should leave him."

River blinked. "What?"

Inara continued, "Now I know you like him a great deal, and you feel safe and secure around him. I know he makes you feel like a real woman and infuriates you at the same time. But he loves you, and that can't be good." Inara gave a smile. "How was that, do you think?"

River laughed. "I don't think that's what the Captain had in mind. But thank you." She gave Inara a warm hug. "Now, let's go see this super secret spy lair," River said, cocking her head toward the exit.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter Four

Connor stepped off the elevator and peered around, amazed. All this was under Khonsu City. Now these looked like Browncoats. No pansy-asses pretending to be Alliance dogs down here. It was like a miniature city, and the complex spread out so far back that Connor couldn't make out the other end of the tunnel. It looked like a real war base, which was astounding as the people going about their normal lives up top barely seemed to know there was a war even going on.

There were half-finished warships, pieces and parts all over the place. Mechanics and crews worked on the ships trying to get them flight worthy again. To the left was a ship graveyard. It looked like a dumping ground. Hell, it probably was. Ships were docked in a row on the right side. Mules sped by carrying people to different parts of the base.

"Mess hall is past the heap on the left. Quarters are all the way down, straight. Can't miss 'em," Connor's guide said, giving Connor a little slap o the back before turning and going back up the elevator. "Find Cobb in the mess. He'll show you around!" he yelled as he went up.

Connor started walking. It didn't seem quite right that he should have to walk everywhere. Didn't these people realize who Connor was and how important he was to River Tam? And then to have to ask Cobb for help? Wait. Cobb?

Connor had a hard time believing Jayne Cobb would be in the mess hall, just waiting to give Connor a tour. For some reason the Hero of Canton had never liked Connor. But then, maybe River had told him to be nice. Cobb had a way of doing whatever River told him to do, Connor had noticed. Of course, you don't really argue with a mind-reading genius who can kill you with her brain. Or, if not her brain, then with one swift kick to the head.

Connor smiled to himself, thinking of his social clout as River Tam's man. Everyone knew he had won her. In coming to Khonsu, Connor hoped to prove it to any doubters out there. Everyone would see her leaving his quarters in the morning, and they would know. It wasn't Reynolds you had to see if you wanted River Tam on your mission. Not at all. The man you wanted was Kyle Connor.

Connor came upon the mess hall quite suddenly. He stopped short and a Browncoat behind him ran into him. "Watch it!" he yelled.

The Browncoat glared at him and said, "Ain't my problem your gorram brake lights ain't workin' right."

A woman ran up to the stranger and asked, "Is it true? Is Serenity really here, Sam?"

Sam smiled at her, "That's the rumor. And 'round here, rumors are usually true, Meg."

Meg squealed with delight. "Oh! I can't wait to meet them! I hear they're quite a sight! Biggest damn heroes the Browncoats have ever seen!"

"Yeah, well, can't believe everything you hear about them, that's my view on it."

"But you just said rumors - "

"Rumors ain't the same as legends."

"Well, I can tell you," Connor said with pride, "All them legends you're talking about are also true."

Sam and Meg looked at him, then back at each other. They started laughing. They were still laughing as they turned and walked away. Connor heard Sam say, "Yeah, stupid kid really knows something we don't. Bet he couldn't find his ass with both hands and a roadmap."

Connor was fuming as he entered the mess hall. His first impression was that someone had had fun building _this_ place. It was only a mess hall in name. There were soldiers, and there were meals. But that's where the definition ceased to apply.

It was, actually, a bar. A big gorram bar. There were pool tables and card tables, and an area with no tables at all, which was at the moment crowded with people trying to dance. Music was playing somewhere, but Connor could barely hear it over the laughter and conversation of the crowd. No wonder the dancers seemed unsure what steps to try.

Connor took a few steps in, adjusting his pack, and looked around, aware that his face hid none of his astonishment.

"After a few days of lying to everyone you meet, folks just want to relax and have fun," a very tall fellow standing by the door said. "Connor right?" He pointed to the pack. "Figured it was you." Connor nodded. The man looked vaguely familiar. "Name's Jordan Cobb." He stuck out his hand. Connor shook it. "Damn glad to meet ya. Let's give you a proper Browncoat welcome."

Jordan gave a shrill whistle. Everyone stopped what they were doing. Now Connor could hear the music. It was a banjo. "This here's Connor! Let's get him a drink!"

Everyone cheered at him. Random folks hugged him. Someone handed him a glass. Someone else took his pack. Connor felt uncomfortable for a few minutes. Then he decided to get used to being welcomed like a hero and started drinking. In about five minutes he'd made a whole handful of new friends. He was having such a good time, he forgot to ask Jordan if he had a brother. Or a cousin. Or some kind of relation named Jayne.

Pretty soon Connor had what he liked best in the verse, an audience. He told them all about him and River Tam, how she was his girl and he was here on Khonsu because they couldn't stand to be apart for long. He was in the middle of telling them how much Captain Reynolds approved of his style when an older Browncoat put a hand on his shoulder.

"All right, loud mouth, time to go."

"But I was just starting to have fun!" Connor said. "Who are you, anyways?"

The Browncoat glared at him. He was tall and had an ugly scar on his neck. Seemed to Connor the man was a couple years older than the Captain. An Old School Browncoat. "Colonel Geming Smith." He nodded to the bar. "And that little sip of fun better last in your memory a good long time, 'cause that's the last bit you're gonna get in a long while."

"Hey, what'd I do? We were just having a welcoming party."

"What'd you do? I don't know. Maybe I just found out my latest recruit is a baby-faced idiot who can't hold his liquor or his tongue. I must be cursed, 'cause the same simple-minded worm also has intimate knowledge of Serenity and her entire crew."

"You have no idea how intimate, Sir," Jordan Cobb piped up from behind Connor.

"You shut your face, Cobb. Ain't it about time you had yourself a family reunion anyhow?"

Connor looked back at Jordan. The man shrugged, set down his glass, gave Colonel Smith a stiff salute, and walked out of the bar, "Suit yourself; means you get to show the kid around the base."

"Eyes front, soldier," Colonel Smith said. Connor's eyes snapped to him. "Until you learn how to shut the hell up, you ain't doing nothing without my approval, got it?" Connor didn't nod. Colonel Smith moved on, ticking off on his fingers the things Connor was now forbidden to do. "No smokin', no drinkin',. no women." He glared. "And no flying, neither. You're grounded. More than that, son, you ain't even going up top without my say-so. You got that, boy?" Connor glared right back at him. "I said, you got that, boy?"

"Sir, yes, sir," Connor muttered.

Colonel Smith didn't seem happy about that response, but he took it. "I ain't having you spilling River Tam's gorram shoe size to anyone what buys you a drink." He shook his head. "What you got to realize, son, is these ain't normal circumstances. We keep details to ourselves. We talk about the weather. Or nuthin'. Or things before the war. We don't talk about our most important ship, our most important weapon, and her crew. Ever."

"Come on, they're all Browncoats!" Connor yelped. A second later he added, "Sir."

Colonel Smith looked him hard in the eye. "You know that for sure, do you, boy? You know all them actually trust Reynolds? You think some of them aren't scared to death of River Tam bein' here and wantin' her gone? These are an angry lot, son. Information is a weapon to them. Even folks that call themselves Browncoats can be enemies in Khonsu City."

"With all due respect, Sir, I think you're overreacting."

"And I think you are dumbass. A dumbass what can find his own gorram way to his bunk and stay there until he's called upon." The Colonel threw Connor's pack into his chest and walked out of the bar.

Connor heard someone behind him mutter, "Buzz kill."

"Woo-ee, thought he'd have gotten better with Serenity docked here. Works real well into that master plan of his," someone else said.

"Maybe Reynolds ain't cooperating. That'd make him madder than hell."

Someone else laughed. "Way I sees it, you can't get much madder than Geming Smith anyway. That there's a mean son of a bitch."

"I thought you liked the guy! Just the other day you was spinning his war stories out for us."

"Yeah, well, he's a hell of a soldier. That there's true," the man replied, "but that don't make him sane."

"Hey, Connor, you'd better get to your bunk quick. Smith's the kind to throw you behind bars for sneezing. Would not wanna be caught disregarding orders."

Connor shouldered his pack and moved towards the door. His new friends called out a goodbye, which he answered with a slight wave. As he left the bar, though, he was muttering to himself in Chinese. Smith didn't realize how important Connor was. Soon he'd realize. Connor didn't have to take any slag from anybody. Not even a Colonel.

Readjusting his pack, Connor decided to go find Serenity. That would be his bunk. Soon Reynolds would ask him to stay on as part of the crew, seeing how attached River was to him. He would have to. And then Connor wouldn't have to answer to the regular Browncoats. He would prove he was just as good a pilot as Washburne had been. And smarter, too, 'cause Connor would stay the hell away from Reavers.

Connor walked among the side alleys and tracks along the base until finally he didn't know which way was up. He wandered aways more and spotted a Firefly. It was not Serenity. Connor knew that right away. This one looked even more like a bucket of rusty bolts than Serenity did. A difficult feat to accomplish. There weren't many Firefly class ships still flying. Connor doubted this one could even get an inch off the ground. It was half-finished, the shuttles were missing, and the hull plating looked like someone had tried to combine two different jigsaw puzzles into one picture.

An excited young girl was bouncing around on the opposite side of the ship. Connor could see her feet and hear her voice. "She don't look like much now, but she'll be sailin' in no time flat!"

Connor doubted that.

"You've got a fine start," a man said. Connor couldn't see him, but he recognized the voice. Reynolds. Thank God. Now Connor could finally stop wandering around. He started walking to the other side of the ship but stopped in his tracks as he came across a bizarre scene in a shadowy corner against the Firefly.

It took Connor a second for his brain to interpret the darkened images into coherent fact. A woman, his brain said River, had her arms around a man's neck, and she was kissing him like she had never kissed Connor. She had him up against the Firefly, and she kissed him hungrily, like she was trying to devour his lips with hers. The man was a mountain, and his brain told him it was Jayne Cobb, but Connor couldn't quite believe it. Jayne Cobb's hands were sliding over River's lower back as he met her kiss with a hunger of his own. As Connor watched, stunned for a moment, Jayne's hand slipped underneath River's shirt and began to creep up.

Connor yelled out in Chinese.

River sprang backward in surprise. Jayne Cobb raised a gun, but River put a hand on his arm, forcing the so-called Hero of Canton to lower his weapon.

"You bitch!" Connor spat at River. "What the hell do you think you're doing?"

"I think I'm making out with Jayne," River said calmly.

How he hated her in that moment. The calmness in her voice after what she'd just done to him.

"If you don't want an answer, don't ask the question," River reminded him.

He wanted to kill her, take her neck in his hands and choke the life out of her. Teach her that she was his girl and would always be his girl. No one else's. Connor's very soul shook with rage.

"As if you even could kill me," River said. "As if you could even take a step towards without me knowing exactly what you were planning five minutes before you did it."

Connor shook his head, confused. He hadn't actually said those things aloud. He'd never really believed the stories about River Tam being able to read minds. That was just a war story.

"Wrong-oh," River said.

"All those months you pretended to be a normal girl, but you ain't! You really are the Moonbrained witch everyone says you are!"

"Please, act like you cared one second about me. Please do. Make sure everyone feels sorry for Kyle Connor. A little baby with delusions of being a prince. You have no power, Connor. You never did, and you never will. And that's the sad truth of you."

Connor glared. What the hell did she know? "You're just a common whore, River Tam! You hear me? A who - "

Jayne Cobb was on him before Connor knew what was happening. He hit Connor in the side of the head with his gun. The blow landed Connor on the floor. Jayne dragged him up and punched him in the face again and then a third time.

The world was growing very blurry. Connor heard someone yell, "Jayne, stop it!" Then Connor was on the ground again. He felt a jab in his ribcage as someone kicked him.

Chinese mutterings were followed by, "Better get him to the infirmary."

Connor liked that idea. He moaned in approval. Then someone kicked him again. This one landed on is head, and he passed out.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter Five

Mal and the crew stood outside the infirmary tent waiting to see if Connor was going to make it. A secret part of Mal wished he'd been the one to mess up Connor's face. And Mal thought that little idiot was good enough for River. Bastard wasn't good enough to look at her.

"Sonovabitch is lucky I didn't shoot him," Jayne growled.

Mal glared at him. They'd been in Khonsu not one gorram day, and Jayne was already making trouble.

"Captain Hypocrite," River muttered under her breath.

Mal swung his glare towards River. "Did you really have to kick him when he was already down? Twice?"

"Yes," River said simply.

Zoe laughed. "Hell, Captain, you would've kicked the boy, too."

"Damn straight," Jayne said, nodding at Zoe.

Simon was wrong. This, right here, was what going mad felt like.

A medic came out of the infirmary. "Well, he'll live. He's got a concussion and he'll not be as pretty as he once was. But other than his ego, there'll be no lasting damage."

"Too bad," Jayne said softly.

"Thanks, Doc," Mal said, glaring at Jayne.

A Browncoat officer came out of the infirmary as well. "Seems Connor in there claims y'all tried to kill him." He looked over at Jayne and River. Jayne put a protective arm around her shoulders as she leaned into him. Mal saw that she was actually reaching for one of Jayne's guns. Just in case. The officer gave a short laugh, probably catching sight of Jayne's portable arsenal. "But I figure, if that were the case, why, the gorram kid wouldn't be talking at me at all." He gave another nervous laugh. "I gotta know, though, for the record, how the fight started?"

Jayne scowled, going into his silent mode. Like if he stared at the fella long enough, he'd forget that Jayne was the one in trouble.

River looked the officer straight in the eye. "He was verbally abusive and making threats against my person."

The officer nodded. "I won't be pressing charges. Not that, you know, I could arrest you and get away with it anyway," he said. "But I would be obliged if you refrained from beating out new recruits to a bloody pulp? At least on their first day here?"

"So long as they have more manners than Connor, I think we can manage that," River said.

The officer nodded again and started walking away. He turned, as if he'd forgotten something. "I'd be careful, though. Kid's powerful angry. I wouldn't be surprised none if he tried to retaliate."

Kyle Connor did have a powerful temper. Before now, Mal had always considered it one of the boy's better assets. That was when it had been turned on the Alliance.

"We'll be careful," Mal said, nodding at the officer. He turned to look at Jayne and River. Jayne was more relaxed now that the officer was gone, but they hadn't moved apart. "Well I don't care how rude they are, you can't go around beating up all our allies."

"Connor ain't an ally," Jayne said. "He's an asshole."

"Verse is filled with assholes!" Mal nearly screamed. "You gonna beat them all up?"

"Thinking about it," River said, glaring right back at Mal.

Mal didn't care. They had to realize that not everyone was going to accept them. They were already famous. Reputations were working against them. Mal figured Connor's outburst was only going to be the first of many fights for River and Jayne.

"And I'll bet you a million credits that most of those fights, Malcolm, will be instigated by you," River said. She pulled Jayne away from the group and added, "We'll be in Jayne's bunk."

Mal stomped away from the base infirmary, not sure where he was going. He couldn't actually stomp back to his ship now. It was being taken over by a pair of sex-crazed moonbrains, and he really didn't want to think about what they were doing there. He walked back to the main road down the middle of the base and headed for the living quarters. He figured he'd see how the Browncoats were planning on making the crew of Serenity feel welcome. He didn't make it very far before Inara called his name.

"You've _got_ to stop doing this," he said, turning.

"Where are you going, Mal? Gonna find yourself another mercenary so you can kick Jayne off the ship?"

"I don't know why I listened to you! I should have trusted my instincts and thrown Jayne out the airlock a long time ago! She never used to be this, this - " Mal searched for the right word. "Bothersome. Something he's taught her."

Inara shook her head. "No, Mal, it's something you've taught her. She recognizes the right thing when no one else does. Used to be you liked that about her."

"How's being with Jayne the right thing, exactly?"

Inara shrugged. "She's following her heart. I for one admire her bravery. She saw what – who – she wanted and she went after it. Him. It." She looked Mal right in the eye. "Of course, if Jayne had any sense at all, he'd have gone after her a long time ago. Instead of wasting time worrying about what other people would think."

She took a step closer to him, and Mal got the impression she wasn't just talking about River and Jayne anymore.

"Why do you keep following me, Inara?" Mal asked, the anger gone from his voice.

"Someone has to keep you out of trouble, Mal. You know, make sure you don't kill off your crew one by one." She smiled slightly.

"You don't think I'd have the sense to leave at least a couple of them alive?"

"Mal, I don't think you have any sense at all."

Simon chose that moment to come up to them and ask Inara for advice about something.

"Speaking of people without any sense," Mal nodded at Simon. Inara gave a short laugh that made Mal forget for a minute that he was ready to throttle most of his crew.

"I graduated in the top - "

"Three percent. Yeah, I know. So, tell, me how is that helpin' ya with Kaylee?" Mal didn't wait for Simon's response. He doubled back to the infirmary tent, where Zoe was still milling around, sizing up the place. "I think we ought to have the crew split up and get a feel for this place," he told her.

Zoe nodded. "I was just about thinkin' the same thing, Sir. Something about this place," she shook her head. "Seems a might strange to me."

"Right, we'll give everyone a chance to rest up a bit, then hit the base tonight."

That night, Kuan-yin came by to take Kaylee around the base. Inara tagged along. Simon was not invited. The doctor opted to stay on the ship.

General Geller offered herself as a guide to Mal and Zoe, to which Mal replied, "If it's all the same to you, General, we'll find our own way."

"Suit yourself, Captain," she said, smiling. She turned to River and Jayne. "How about you two? Or would you rather be alone as well?"

"Actually, we wanted to meet the other top officers," River said. "Your key members of the underground?"

No, she didn't. She wanted to spy. Mal shot her a disapproving look. She didn't need to spy on anyone.

"That can be arranged, " General Geller said, nodding. Her smile faded. River was making her nervous.

"On second thought, I think the Captain would prefer if Jayne and I spent more time alone," River said sweetly.

"No, no, by all means, socialize with the local leadership," Mal said. _Just don't get accused of witchcraft and get yourself lit on fire. _

River gave him a fake sweet smile.

Geller smiled nervously. "Very well, then. Afraid there aren't many of us. But they'd all be happy to meet you," she said as calmly as she could as she led River and Jayne away.

Mal glared at their backs. This was ridiculous. He certainly hoped this little romance was going to be over soon. He held onto the hope that River would wake up, realize Mal was always right, leave Jayne alone, and start following his gorram orders again.

As he and Zoe started walking away from the ship, Mal noticed Zoe was looking at him rather strangely.

"There something I'm doing that's bothering you, Zoe?"

"There is, Sir."

"Then spit it out. I don't fair well with games."

"Well, Sir, you're being an ass," Zoe said calmly, as if she were pointing out that Mal had something in his teeth.

"Come again?"

"You gotta stop, Sir. They're together. You just have to deal with that fact. I won't let you drive a wedge between them."

"Shipboard romances." Mal shook his head. "They're complicated."

"Only because you make them that way, Sir," Zoe said, looking away.

"This is different, Zoe," Mal said, knowing Zoe's mind was back on Wash.

"Don't rightly see how, Sir."

"This is River and Jayne we're talking about here. That match can't end well. Most likely, they'll turn and kill each other eventually, and then where will we all be?"

"Enjoying the show, I imagine," Zoe joked. "The only difference in this situation is that River never follows your orders, while I, save one order you had no right to give, always did."

Mal stopped to look at her. He remembered the look on her face when she told him she and Wash were getting married. The look told him that if Mal messed things up, she'd have to kill him. Probably slowly and painfully. She had the same seriousness about her now in defending Jayne and River.

Mal sighed. "All right, Zoe. I will try to be less of an ass. And I promise to do my best not to throw Jayne out the airlock and end this moonbrained craziness. That's my best offer."

"I'll take it, Sir."

"All right, then. On a different matter altogether, anything about this place strike you as odd?"

"In point of fact, Captain, everything about this place strikes me as odd."

"I can't quite put my finger on it yet, but ever since we got here, I've just got a bad feeling about the whole thing. Like this ain't quite right."

"Why would they establish a Browncoat Underground on a planet with an Alliance Academy on it?"

"That is one of the questions pounding away at my brain. Gotta figure they didn't know." The base illustrated years of work and dedication to the cause. How could they have not found out before doing all this?

"You think that's likely to be true, Sir?"

"Hell, no, but it's the only answer we got at the moment. Unless - "

"They did it on purpose for some reason. In which case, Sir - "

"We're the some reason. Or, more point-like - "

"River's the reason."

Mal nodded. "Not that it ain't a noble venture. Liberating an Alliance Academy and all. More than that, it sounds downright fun."

"We have done worse jobs for worse reasons," Zoe admitted.

Mal nodded. They were a strange bunch, but they were Browncoats. They were on the same side.

Mal and Zoe spent another hour or so walking around the base, getting the layout down in their heads. These Browncoats were certainly ready for a war. The base was set up like a grid, and although it looked like there were thousands coming through the base, Mal realized very quickly that only a fraction actually stayed there. There were at least three dozen elevators scattered across the base, and Mal had to wonder what the hell this place was before the war. Three elevators were large enough for ships and vehicles. The others were normal sized or smaller. One looked about the size of a cortex booth. A lot of planning had gone into this place, and if you didn't have a guide, Mal doubted you could find your way anywhere but where you'd already been.

By the time Mal and Zoe made it back to Serenity, the rest of the crew was already engrossed in an animated conversation around the kitchen table. Jayne was standing, looking incredibly angry. River was pacing up and down the room, speaking very fast, in short bursts that made little sense to Mal.

"You can't aim people and fire them on their creators and tell them they are free!"

Mal hadn't seen River this agitated since her first battle. "What's all this about?" he asked the crew.

River muttered at him in Chinese, spun and turned around into Jayne's chest, where she started crying.

Mal blinked. "Anyone? What happened?"

"River found out why we're here," Jayne said calmly, rubbing River's back as she cried. "And we don't like it much."


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter Six

River's mind was reeling. She kept seeing a line of young people walking out onto a battlefield. There were a dozen or so kids again an army of Alliance troops. In River's vision, they calmly walked up to the enemy and attacked, laying waste to them in a wave of destruction the leaders of the Browncoat Underground in Khonsu City couldn't quite imagine properly. They imagined explosions out of the Academy students' minds, speed of light martial arts, and panic from the other side. Victory for the Browncoats. The end of the war.

That's what the imagined. A line of secret weapons they could aim and fire on their unsuspecting enemy. And the key to their dreams, the key to that line of secret weapons was the original weapon. River Tam.

"Somehow, can't say I'm entirely surprised," Mal said from his seat at the head of the table. Jayne had told them all for her. She couldn't quite grasp normal speech patterns yet. "You sure they ain't gonna ask them nicely to smite their enemies?"

River shook her head. "They've seen the tape of me. In the bar. They want an army of River Tams. Chaos. Using enemy technology against them. Not likely they'll stop to ask permission."

"This is insane!" Inara said. "Mal, you can't let them do this! Liberating an Academy is one thing. Using the students for their own gain is another."

Inara was noble and good. And right, of course.

But River could see Mal was also considering the perfection of this plan. He'd seen River in action. He couldn't deny she was good at destruction. And who was to say how far these kids had gone. Maybe they weren't even kids anymore. Maybe they really were just weapons now. Maybe all humanity had left them, and unlike River, they wouldn't be able to be brought back.

He wasn't happy about it. He just had no way of knowing.

"Except to try," River offered in a whisper. Mal looked at her. For the first time in days, he wasn't angry with her. For a moment River saw herself through the Captain's eyes, and she was embarrassed how small and young she looked.

A little girl in a box. The little girl Mal had to save. In the bar, a weapon he had to stop. Tied to a post. Jumping down from Jubal Early's ship. Dancing with Jayne. Arguing with Mal. A real girl. Not a weapon.

The Alliance couldn't take people and turn them into weapons. There had to be a way to save those kids.

"So what's the plan? We just gonna get the hell off this rock, right?" Jayne offered.

"Usually don't you have some pretty negative remarks about running away from a fight?" Mal asked.

"No River, no liberating an Alliance Academy. Browncoat asses thwarted," Jayne explained.

He didn't really want to run. He wanted to stay and shoot him some Browncoats. But he also felt that he had to protect River.

"They'd have to try it eventually, Jayne," Zoe said calmly. "they can't move forward with their master plan with an Alliance Academy in operation just down the street. They'd be slaughtered."

"I say we leave them to it, then," Jayne muttered.

"Wait a minute! They're not all bad. You really think they deserve that?" Kaylee asked, thinking of Kuan-yin. And she was right about the Browncoats. Most of them didn't even have a clue about the Academy.

"Wouldn't they just abandon the project?" Simon offered. "With no chance of success - "

"But there is a chance, Doc. You're proof of that. No, they've spent too much time here to just give up. They'll try, and they might just pull it off without us."

"What do you want us to do, Sir?"

"I want to liberate us an Academy."

"Ain't that exactly what they want us to do?" Jayne asked.

"Yes, but we're gonna run off with the students before the Browncoats can turn them into weapons again."

A little girl in a box who he had to save and couldn't leave behind.

"How exactly you planning to pull this off, Captain?" Kaylee asked.

"We could play along with the Underground. Let them think we're all aboard with their plan until we get the kids out," Zoe said.

Mal nodded. "Then we burn atom. Get as far from here as fast as possible. Probably Haven. Good and far from any fighting whatsoever."

"With a shipload of Alliance trained assassins and both the Alliance and the Browncoat Underground coming after us to get the kids back?" Jayne asked. He didn't wait for an answer before concluding, "Suicide."

"You want us to leave the kids in there?" Mal asked.

"Hell, we didn't send 'em to an Alliance Academy for Prodigies. They ain't our responsibility. Can't save the whole 'verse, Mal."

"Good thing not everyone thinks like you, Jayne," Inara said, angry and disappointed in the mercenary.

"River?" Mal asked. "What've you got to say about this?"

She looked at him. So many opinions running through her head. Which one was hers again?

She chanced a glance at Simon. He was so worried for her, but he was also thinking of the Academy students and what the Alliance had put River through. _They're hurting us._ He would have gotten them all out if he could've.

_She knows what's right and she does it._ Zoe's voice. Mal's head. He trusted her after all.

The more River listened to everyone else's thoughts, the more she realized the decision really would be hers. If she said run, like Jayne wanted, they'd run. If she said fight, they'd fight.

"We can't leave them there. We've got to try."

_Suicide. _To Jayne's credit, he didn't say it out loud.

Mal nodded. "All right then. We'll tell them we're willing and ready to help first thing tomorrow." He was worried about River. Apparently she looked tired. She'd never admit it, but she really was.

Jayne stood up quickly and stomped from the kitchen.

Mal sighed, looked at River, and said, "Better go after your man before he decides to go kill someone."

River nodded, "He takes so much looking after." She gave the Captain a smile as she followed Jayne. She had a feeling Mal wouldn't be giving them any more trouble. At least, not for a while.

She found Jayne in his bunk. He'd come down here to calm down so she wouldn't hear everything going through his head. Anger. Fear. Frustration. Love.

"It's crazy. The most Moonbrained thing we've ever even thought about doing!" Jayne yelled as she slid down into the room.

"Incorrect conclusion," River stated. "By far the most Moonbrained plan was disguising ourselves as Reavers."

"The second, then."

"Incorrect again. I believe it is universally acknowledged that the second craziest thing we've ever done was attack Niska's complex and live," River said. "But, third, maybe. We'll give it third."

Jayne shook his head. "Girl, this ain't no time to be playin' 'round. Can't you think this through? Ain't you supposed to be the genius? We'll have the whole gorram 'verse after us! That's if we even get out of the Academy!"

"Never knew you had such a mind for the future, Jayne."

He glared and stomped away from her. It was a small room, so he really couldn't stomp very far. Which made him all the more frustrated.

"You aren't angry, Jayne," River stated.

"Oh, ain't I? I think I'm pretty gorram pissed off!"

"You're scared."

"Scared? Jayne Cobb ain't scared of nothing."

"Wrong. Jayne is scared of a lot of things. Of losing things. Of being weak. Of caring too much."

Jayne looked at her.

"You're scared I'm going to leave you. And you're scared of what that means." River took a step closer.

"Really? And what does it mean?" Jayne asked. Even though he knew. He knew it meant he loved her. Would do anything to keep her out of danger. Couldn't stand to lose her. Not ever. He loved her that much.

Not that he'd admit it. He'd rather make her say it for him. She knew, after all. Wasn't that what mattered? That she knew exactly how he felt about her?

"It isn't real unless _you_ say it, Jayne," River said softly.

His angry façade melted away, and he kissed her, putting his arms around her. He was opting to _show_ her instead. This was an agreeable compromise for the moment. River rather liked being shown things.

It was impossible for River to distinguish one feeling from another. One passion from the other. They were one now. Rayne. His needs were hers, too. He wanted her so much she could barely stand it. He made love to her like she had always been his woman. He wanted her over the edge with him, to feel how powerful they were together. He wanted them to stay like this forever.

There was no war, just their bodies. No one else could intrude on their world. No power in the 'verse could stop them.

River lay in Jayne's bed, head still reeling from their shared ecstasy. Jayne caressed her face, looking deep in her eyes. River imagined drowning in Jayne's eyes. It was a plausible scenario. And not an entirely unpleasant one.

For a few moments, River thought he would actually say it now. Make it real. It was real, of course, but River wasn't going to be the first one to say it out loud. It was his turn to make the first step.

He didn't say it, though, which made River a little sad. Jayne was still afraid.

"I still don't want to go liberate an Academy," he said.

It sounded like Jayne being a selfish man-ape gone wrong thing. But, hell, he didn't even want River in the war at all anymore. She was his woman now, and he had to protect her.

"Less talk, more Rayne."

"Rain?" Jayne asked.

"No," River shook her head, wrapped her arms and legs around Jayne's strong body and said, "Rayne."

Later, River watched him as he fell asleep beside her. Wrapped in his strong, protective arms, she wondered what their future would be like.

She imagined the Captain marrying them. Mal wouldn't want to do it, but River would ask him very sweetly. And if she caught him on a good day, he'd say yes.

Simon would give her away. Kaylee would be, hopefully, matron of honor. Maybe one of Jayne's brothers would be best man.

They'd get married on Achilles if they could. It would be nice at least to stop by. Quick wedding. Maybe bribe the new Sheriff not to arrest Jayne. Be like ordinary folk for a while, with a real family and no baggage.

Then they'd go to Haven. Just for a week or so. Then they'd all start flying again. Maybe Inara would give up her shuttle, and they could have more privacy on the ship.

What would their children be like? Clever. Beautiful. She imagined Jayne chasing a gang of children around the ship, and she almost started laughing. He'd be a little tough, maybe, but he'd be a good father. If they had a girl, she'd have him wrapped around her finger before she could even talk. And he'd take good care of them. Protect them.

River snapped back to reality. Before any of that could happen, they had to break into an Alliance Academy, kidnap all the students, who may or may not be entirely stable, and get away from the Alliance Operatives they would send as well as the Browncoat Underground who would be more than a little annoyed at their sudden, but as River saw it, inevitable, betrayal. And if they got clear of all that trouble, there was still a war going on that could change the destiny of the human race.

Suddenly, Jayne wasn't the only one who was scared. And just in case she didn't get another chance to say it out loud, River whispered in the dark, "I love you, Jayne."


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter Seven

They were lost in a maze of stark white, cold corridors. Worse than that, there weren't even any doors or windows by which to judge where they'd been. There were just walls and no way out. Jayne was beginning to have trouble breathing. River was ahead of him, trying to lead them to a brilliant escape, but it was no use. They'd be there until the Alliance Operatives found them and killed them. Hopefully in a relatively painless manner. Jayne was almost out of ammo. When they ran into trouble, which would probably happen any second now, it would be over. They turned a corner and hit a dead end.

Two panels on the wall now facing them slid open to reveal a large screen. A familiar commercial started playing.

"Fruity Oaty Bars make a man out of a mouse! Fruity Oaty Bars make you burst out of your blouse! Eat them all the time! Let them blow your mind! WOW!"

River stopped dead in her tracks. She tilted her head to the side for a moment before turning on Jayne and lunging at him.

Before he knew what he was doing, Jayne raised his gun and fired.

Jayne awoke to the sound of banging on his door. It took a moment for Jayne to catch his breath after he realized it had only been a dream.

"Jayne! Rise and shine! Got someone waitin' for ya in the hold!" the Captain yelled through the door.

"Who the hell?" Jayne mumbled as he rolled out of bed. River was still sleeping. He wondered how she had slept through the knocking and yelling. She must have been really tired. Yawning, Jayne threw some clothes on and made his way to the hold. When he got down there, all he saw was a tall man with his back to him. He didn't recognize him until the man turned around. "Jordan?"

His little brother nodded at him, hands on his hips. Then he shook his head. "You really went back to Achilles for Jaxon?"

"'Course I did. Someone had to whip his sorry ass back into shape," Jayne said.

There was an awkward silence. Jayne descended the stairs and offered his brother his hand. Jordan shook it. "Damn good to see ya, Jayne."

"Damn good to see you haven't gotten yourself killed yet."

"Come on, Jayne. I'm tougher than that."

"Knew that set of eyes of yours would get you into a fair bit of trouble one day. What've they got you doin' here, anyhow? What use could a sniper be to a bunch of spies?"

"Quite a lot of use, actually," Jordan said. He glared at him for a moment. "I know what I'm doing, Jayne. Big boy. Can choose what I do with my own life."

"Been waitin' a long time to tell me that, haven't ya?"

"You should've let me come with you."

Jayne looked away. "Wouldn't've changed nuthing."

Jordan shook his head. "You don't know that, Jayne."

"Would've just brought you down with me, is all," Jayne said. "You didn't need no one messing up your life."

"Yeah, I did a fine enough job on my own," Jordan muttered. They stood there a few mre moments. "They got you doing somethin' big, don't they?"

"What makes ya say that?"

"Just a feelin' I get," Jordan said, shrugging. He looked at Jayne.

Of all his family, Jordan had always been the one to read exactly when Jayne was planning to do something stupid. Most of the time, Jordan had also been the one who could talk him out of doing it. Except once.

"Hey, let's forget all this Browncoat garbage," Jayne said, clapping a hand on Jordan's shoulder. "Catch me up on your life."

"Nothing's changed, Jayne. Momma's gone and told you about Laura. Still the big gapin' hole in my life it was five years ago. Just tryin' to keep movin'. And here's about as far as I could move."

Jayne nodded. He certainly didn't seem like the little brother he'd left back on Achilles. It was like he was broken, cold. But after what he'd been through, it wasn't really a wonder.

"Momma says you got yourself a fine young lady lookin' after ya, keepin' ya out of trouble," Jordan said suddenly, changing the subject. "And there's rumors floatin' around the base it's none other than River Tam." He laughed. "Usually when girls get a good look how your mind works, they go running for the hills."

Jayne smiled. "Maybe she likes how my mind works," he said slyly.

Jordan laughed again. "Not likely, big brother."

"So, what, you come down here just to laugh at me, or you have something more specific in mind?"

Jordan smiled. "Hell, Jayne. Haven't seen ya in so long, thought I'd better make sure we've got the real Jayne Cobb here," he paused, the smile vanishing. "And I wanted to say sorry I wasn't there for Jaxon. I shoulda been. You put yerself in danger, and - "

"Don't apologize," Jayne said gruffly. "You're a gorram fool, Jordan. Apologizin' for something weren't even your fault by any manner of lookin' at the situation."

Jordan looked him in the eye. Then he shook his head and laughed again. "You know, Jayne, you're a lot more honorable than I recall. Maybe that River Tam's just the perfect person for you. Even when you're actin' all gruff and mean, she'll know you don't mean a damn word of it."

Mal chose this moment to appear on the catwalk and call down, "Jayne, we've got that meetin' in half an hour. You ready to play nice with the Browncoats?"

Jayne turned and looked up at him. The Captain was looking very serious this morning, giving Jayne a mild look of disapproval. Jayne figured the Captain was worried he would make a mistake in the meeting, somehow let on they weren't _actually _going to play nice. "Everything's shiny, Mal," Jayne answered.

Mal nodded and walked away, probably to go make sure everyone else was prepared for their acting debuts.

Jordan whistled. "He's as tough as they say he is, ain't he?" He shook his head. "Couldn't imagine you takin' orders from nobody. But now that I've seen Cap'n Reynolds. Damn, Jayne, I'd do whatever he told me, too."

Jayne laughed. "Don't let him fool ya, Mal's an old softy. Only tough when he's gotta be."

Jordan laughed. It was good to hear him laughing so much. Jayne wouldn't have thought it was possible. "Bet he's gotta be tough a lot around you."

"Well, you know me," Jayne muttered.

"Hell, yeah I do," Jordan said. He looked from the empty spot on the catwalk and back to Jayne. "Say, Jayne, what've they got you here for, anyways? There's all this commotion about the crew of the Serenity being here for something big, but no one seems to know what it is."

Jayne looked away.

"Ah. So it's that big. Probably stupid, too, ain't it?"

Jayne's eyes snapped back to his brother's. "What makes you say that?" He hoped this time Jordan gave him more than "Just a feeling."

"Have you met Colonel Smith? War's made the bastard paranoid and stupid. He's got a mind set on revenge and not much else. Takin' the Alliance down sounds like a good plan, but this guy will try _anything _to deliver a blow," Jordan said. "Don't bode well for the people he's got to use to deliver that blow."

Jayne looked straight at him but didn't say a word. It wasn't Jordan's burden, and he'd be damned if he was gonna drag his little brother into this. It was bound to be bad enough without him.

After a moment, Jordan seemed to get the idea that Jayne wasn't going to say anything else about it. "Just, whatever they've got you doing, be careful," Jordan said.

"Hell, Jordan, you know me," Jayne said again.

"Yeah," Jordan said sadly. "Just be careful. And invite somebody along." Jordan paused a moment before saying, "I'll see you around, Jayne. Don't wanna make you late for that meeting."

Half an hour later, Jayne stood in the conference room of the Browncoat Underground's headquarters. Out the window, he could see the Tower they were now planning to infiltrate. The sight did not fill his mind with warm thoughts. His head kept drifting back to never-ending corridors and no way out.

When Mal told General Gellar that the crew had accepted her mission, she breathed a sigh of relief and said, "Thank you, Captain. This is fantastic news for the whole Browncoat movement. You have no idea the implications of the successful completion of this mission."

"We do," River corrected. "But thanks for saying so, anyway," she said.

If Jayne hadn't known any better, he would have sworn River was being sincere in her eagerness to help and get started planning. He'd seen her act before, of course, but that had been when he still thought she was crazy. River stole a quick glance at him and smiled, letting him know she'd heard that.

"Only choice you coulda made," Colonel Smith stated. "If you're really the heroes everyone says you are," he added. The man damaged Jayne's calm. Smith was a gorram lunatic, and the thought that Jayne would have to play along with this guy made him sick.

"Well, we're in, now, so what's the plan?" Mal asked, leaning forward a bit. They had to get every bit of information they could out of the Browncoats. That's why the whole crew was here. Mal figured it could be that one of them would see or hear something the rest of them missed, and that little piece of information could make a world of difference while this thing played out.

General Gellar smiled, "We got a doc on the inside. Name's Williams. He's got a fine conscience naggin' at him to help us get those kids out." She looked out the fishbowl at the office. "Here he comes now." She looked sheepishly at Mal. "I took a gamble that you'd say yes."

A short, scrawny little man snuck into the room and looked nervously around the assembly. His eyes shot directly to River, and Jayne suddenly wanted to throw the guy out the window.

"Don't be shy, Williams. Have a seat," General Gellar said, motioning to a chair beside her.

Open-mouthed, Williams sat. "I didn't know they'd all be here, General."

"It's okay, Doc. We're all on the same side," General Gellar said. She looked back at Mal. "Doc's been a bit stressed lately, what with him betrayin' his government and all."

Smith laughed. Jayne wondered what the Colonel had done to get Williams to cooperate.

"So, you're going to get us into the Academy?" Kaylee asked. This was her job, make things less tense. Nobody can be on edge with Kaylee talkin' real sweet and innocent. Nobody but Simon, anyway, the moron. River gave Jayne a disapproving look. Like she didn't agree with him. Honestly.

Williams nodded. "I can get you in," he said. "Gettin' out's gonna be the trick."

"No fooling," Jayne said gruffly. "You really a doctor?" Jayne's job was to act himself. When he'd asked what Mal meant by that, River had answered, "Be an ass." It came naturally enough.

The doctor looked nervously at Jayne. Good. The geek was scared of him. That might come in handy.

"What can you tell us about the students?" Simon asked. Simon's one function in all this was to later translate whatever the Alliance doctor or the Browncoat Underground leaders said about the technical aspects of the Academy.

"Well, uh. They're teenagers. The youngest in the program is thirteen. The oldest is twenty. They were orphans and wards of the government before they were chosen by the Academy."

"How were they chosen?" River asked.

The doctor didn't look at her, but at Simon. "They were deemed the most impressionable young minds in the orphan homes in the core. The ones that could be programmed the most effectively."

"Programmed? Like a computer?" Mal asked.

"Precisely like," the doctor said. "Anything the programmer tells them to do, they do it. It's that simple. There's no more what the Alliance called uncontrollable behavior."

"What's uncontrollable behavior?" Zoe asked.

This time the doctor looked at River, as if expecting her to say something at any moment.

River answered for him. "No more outside triggers. No more mind-readers. No more kids with families to protect them. The Alliance has learned many lessons from River Tam and her brother."

For a moment, a darkness settled across the table. It felt like a storm was coming. Jayne was sure any minute the Browncoats would realize they were being duped, that no way could River Tam agree to free those kids just to allow them to be used by another side.

"So, the program can be rewritten, right?" Kaylee asked. "You can set them free."

The doctor looked away from River. "Yes, I believe we can set them free."

Later, back on Serenity, River told the crew, "He was lying. They can't be set free."

"Then I guess we can call this whole gorram stupid idea off now," Jayne said.

"I think the program can be rewritten, though," Simon said, studying a data disc Williams had given him. "The program will never go away, but we can put it to sleep."

"But that means it will always be there," Kaylee said. "What if someone else has the tech to change it?"

"Then we're all gonna die," Jayne said. "Does no one else have a problem with this?"

"Dormant programming is a viable option," River said.

Instead of deferring to River, now they were all waiting for Mal's answer. The Captain was holding back. Jayne recognized that Mal was trying to come up with some kind of plan that didn't involve getting everyone killed. But Mal was also stubborn, and when he decided to go for something, he'd go for it no matter what anybody else said.

"This doesn't change anything. Makes it a bit more interesting, maybe. But doesn't change the fact that we are these kids' only chance." He looked at Jayne, and the mercenary could almost see the apology in the captain's eyes.


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter Eight

The Browncoat Underground was planning an elaborate smash and grab operation. Williams would lead the team in, they'd wipe the kids' current programming, and lead the kids out through the roof, where transport would be waiting to carry them away.

"Kaylee, Zoe, it's going to be up to you two to make sure the Browncoat transport does not leave the base. It's gotta be grounded for some reason or another. At least give us enough time to get there ahead of them and get away clean," the Captain said.

Kaylee was looking over the specs of an Alliance ship the Browncoats had commandeered for the mission. "Shouldn't be too hard. These models got lots of kinks we can exploit. Could rewire the steering mechs here, make it so they can't turn once airborne. They won't know it's sabotage till their up in the air."

The Captain nodded. "Sounds fine. Just keep them from getting there first."

"How exactly we gonna get Serenity there anyway? What with our pilot being in the Academy with us?" Jayne asked. "Can't exactly find ourselves a new pilot who shares our stupidity levels in forty-eight hours."

"Inara," the Captain said, pointing to his right.

"Pardon?" Inara said, alarmed.

"Been telling me what a good pilot you are for years now. Now's your chance to prove it."

"Serenity's a bit bigger than a shuttle, Mal," Inara said.

"Got a better idea?" the Captain asked. He looked around the kitchen table. "Anyone?" No one answered. "It ain't that hard. And you got a whole two days to learn the ropes. Kind of. And, you'll have Kaylee to help you."

"What?" Simon asked. "I thought Kaylee was going to stay out of this!"

The Captain shook his head. "Things have changed, Doc. We all gotta be on Serenity and ready to get the hell off this rock as soon as those kids get on board. There won't be no landing to pick up the rest of our crew."

"I'm up for it, Captain," Kaylee said, refusing to look at Simon.

The Captain gave her a nod. "We've already told them we want to leave as soon as we get back from the mission, so they'll be movin' the ship back topside early that day. Shouldn't be no trouble for ya from there."

"Okay, fine, we found us a pilot-type. But what are we going to do about Williams?" Jayne asked.

"Just what he wants us to do; knock him out and leave him there so the Academy doesn't suspect he was in on it," the Captain said.

"I still don't like that guy," Jayne said.

"'Course not. He's a weasel," River said with disgust.

"A weasel who's going to get us into the Academy," Zoe said. "What about Smith?"

The Captain shook his head. "I haven't quite figured that part out yet. Figure we should try to keep him from even trying to go."

"He won't like being tossed out of his own mission," Zoe argued.

"He'll like the alternative less," the Captain stated.

"The alternative, Captain?" Kaylee asked.

"We'll have to knock him out and leave him, too," the Captain answered, "Along with any of his men that he decides to take along for the ride."

"I say we glide on past the nice guy act and simply put a bullet in him," Jayne said.

Kaylee glared at the mercenary in shock. "You can't just kill him!"

"I'm pretty sure I can," Jayne countered.

"Killin's a last resort, Jayne," the Captain said. Jayne huffed. The Captain added, "I mean it."

Kaylee sat back in her chair as she listened to the Captain tell everyone for the hundredth time that they were to act as though nothing was out of the ordinary. If the Browncoats caught on to the fact that the crew was less than sincere, they were all humped.

"All right, you all know your jobs. Best get to 'em," the Captain finally said, getting up.

Kaylee went straight to the engine room to gather the tools and plans she would need to sabotage the transport ship. She would also check around, make sure Serenity was feeling shiny so Inara would have smooth sailing when they needed it. Maybe she could tighten up the thrusters and make the ship able to break atmo faster.

"Kaylee!" Simon called after her.

"Ain't you supposed to be working on a counter-program for the kids? Something that will keep the other programming out?" Kaylee asked, annoyed.

"Kaylee, I need to talk to you."

"You are talking to me. I ain't stopping your mouth from moving."

"Kaylee," Simon put a hand on her arm, making her turn to face him. His eyes were pleading.

"Oh, don't do that," Kaylee said.

"Don't do what?"

"I'm still mad at you!" Kaylee said severely.

"But don't do what?" he repeated.

"Don't look at me like that when I'm still mad at you!"

"Kaylee, I'm sorry," Simon said.

"Sorry for what, exactly, this time, Simon? For getting me pregnant? For being with me in the first place, perhaps?" Kaylee turned again, walking to the back of the engine room.

"Kaylee!" Simon followed. "Kaylee, stop. Wait a minute." He was chasing her around the engine room now. He got ahead of her and put both hands on her shoulders. "I love you, Kaylee. I don't regret a moment I've spent with you."

Kaylee rolled her eyes.

"Well, maybe one moment," Simon said. Kaylee glared at him. "I should have asked you to marry me a long time ago."

"Yeah, we've known about the baby for three months."

"No, I mean before that. Way before that," Simon said.

"So, why didn't you?" Kaylee asked angrily. "Why'd you wait so long just to botch it up?"

Simon shook his head. "There are so many things I wanted for us. I wanted you to meet my parents. I wanted to meet _your _parents. I wanted to ask your father's permission. And there's a ring that should be yours. It belonged to my grandmother, and it was always supposed to go to the girl I married. I kept thinking that maybe, if I waited a little longer, we could have those things." He looked away. "I wanted to do things right."

Kaylee smiled and touched Simon's face. When he looked at her again, she said, "I don't need those things, Simon. I just needed you to want to be with me."

"Kaylee?" Simon asked, his eyes were shining, pleading again. She couldn't take him lookin' at her like that much longer. "Will you marry me?"

Tears started rolling down Kaylee's cheeks. She nodded and leapt into Simon's arms.

The Captain, suddenly appearing in the doorway, cleared his throat. Kaylee and Simon sprang apart. "Ain't there some actual work you two supposed to be getting on with?" he asked, a smile on his face.

Simon nodded, gave Kaylee another quick kiss, and left the engine room.

"Something you needed, Captain?" Kaylee asked, getting back to what she was doing before she'd been interrupted.

"Glad to see you two have worked things out," the Captain said. "Shouldn't go into something like this angry."

Kaylee looked at him. The Captain looked really worried. Usually he tried to hide it a little better. "You all right, Captain?"

"I'm just sorry, Kaylee. I didn't want you anywhere near this mission," he said.

"I ain't helpless, Captain. I'm just pregnant," Kaylee said angrily. The kid glove treatment was starting to wear on her nerves. When she saw the worried expression was still etched on the Captain's face, she softened. "You got me in the safest place in the mission, Captain. I'll be fine onboard Serenity." The Captain nodded. "And so will Inara."

The Captain looked at her, then quickly looked away again. "It ain't Inara I'm worried about," he lied.

"Sure, Captain. You just keep on tellin' yourself that."

"Just, get everything ready, and be careful when you and Zoe go take out the transport ship."

"Yes, Sir, Captain Denial," Kaylee said. The Captain ignored her and left her in the engine room.

It wasn't long after he left that Kaylee realized some of her tools were missing. She must have left them in the hold after trying to fix the mule. It wasn't until she was on the catwalk that she realized the hold was occupied. Even though they were whispering, Kaylee could understand every word they said. She was right above them. She stopped moving and started listening.

"Can't you talk Mal out of this?"

"We must not be thinking of the same Mal, if you have to ask, Jayne," Zoe said.

"But it's suicide!" Jayne whispered gruffly. "You're his first mate; you can't think of some way to get him to change his mind?"

Zoe sighed. "He's got an idea in his head, and it ain't leavin' anytime soon."

"But what about Kaylee? And 'Nara? You sure he's thinkin' about them?" Jayne asked.

"The Captain made a decision, Jayne. River made a decision. We all know you don't like it, but there's nuthin' you can do about it." Zoe paused a moment, then asked, "What's got you so worked up, Jayne? Thought you'd _want _to pull a fast one on these Browncoats."

"Just gotta bad feelin' 'bout it, is all," Jayne said. "Like I'm gonna be sick. Just know something's not gonna go right."

"It's us, Jayne. Nothing 'round here ever goes according to plan."

"Yeah, but this time it's different," Jayne said. "Listen, you sure you can't talk Mal out of this?"

"Sure as the end of the world, Jayne," she answered. There was a silence. Kaylee figured the idea was finally sinking into Jayne's head. "Jayne," Zoe said after a few moments, "River can take care of herself. You don't have to worry about her."

"Yeah, actually, I do," Jayne said. Kaylee heard him stomping away. He was coming her way.

"Hullo, Jayne," Kaylee said, acting like she'd just got there.

Jayne stopped and narrowed his eyes at her. "You look like the cat what swallowed the canary," he said.

Kaylee looked away. "I don't know what you mean, Jayne. Just came by to get my tools I left in the - "

"Yeah, whatever," Jayne said gruffly, sliding past Kaylee and stomping away.

Kaylee blinked after him.

"You best work on your lying," Zoe said as Kaylee came down the stairs. "Elsewise, we might end up staying in Khonsu City longer than we'd like."

"I really wasn't tryin' to listen, honest!" Kaylee admitted. "It just sorta happened." Zoe put a hand on her shoulder in understanding. Kaylee half-smiled and nodded towards the catwalk. "He's got it bad for her, huh?" she asked.

Zoe shook her head. "Something's got Jayne wound up tight. He's never been like this about a mission before. Not even with Niska."

Kaylee nodded. "Don't fill me with no warm and fuzzy feelin's, seeing Jayne that scared. Don't bode well for us, does it?"

"I imagine not," Zoe admitted. She shook her head again. "Now, don't worry, little Kaylee. River'll sort him out.. He'll come through when we need him. He always does. You just wait and see. In three days, we'll be outta here and far into the black where we belong."

Kaylee hoped she was right, but she didn't quite believe it. They were about to do something incredibly brave and stupid. They needed the old Jayne back. Grenade throwing, sharp-shooting, bullet dodging Jayne. Otherwise, they were humped.


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter Nine

"I've been thinkin' on this situation of ours," Colonel Smith said, from his spot at the foot of the kitchen table, "and I will be bringing my own crew along on the mission tomorrow."

It was the evening before the mission, and this emergency meeting had been called by Smith to work out what he felt were wrinkles in the plan. Apparently it had finally occurred to him that personnel were heavily weighted towards the crew of Serenity. It was an understandable about-face, but Zoe still wanted to punch him.

"Are you crazy?" River blurted out.

Smith's right-hand of the day, Jordan Cobb, stifled a laugh. He covered it with a cough, but Zoe wasn't sure it had fooled even the extremely dense Colonel Smith, who was now glaring at River.

"That is to say, Colonel," River started over, changing her tone to sugary sweet, "a mission like this one requires a small infiltration force. the key here being small." She did a very convincing job of presenting a logical argument. Of course, it helped that it happened to be true. The more people on this mission, the harder it would be to pull off.

"If you think I'm going to leave - " the Colonel stole a glance at Jayne, "you all without any support, you've got another think coming."

"We're used to being on our own. More people would just get in the way," Mal said.

"Yeah, we don't need you sorry-ass Browncoats," Jayne said, staring at his brother. Jordan smiled to himself and looked away.

The Colonel was fuming. Zoe imagined smoke coming out of his ears.

River took action before Smith could explode. "We could use your support on the transport ship, Colonel," she said. "We need someone on the Alliance ship who we trust, who we know will keep the second crew calm and in control." The Colonel seemed to like being complimented as a leader. "The thievery we can handle, Colonel. What we really need is a getaway man."

The Colonel took a moment to think on this new plan. Then he nodded. "All right. I'll head the transport crew. You all just make sure you do your part."

"We won't disappoint you, Colonel," River said brightly.

Smith nodded, resisting looking River in the eye. She'd just played him like a violin, and he hadn't even noticed. Jayne was standing behind River's chair, glaring at Smith. He reminded Zoe of a guard dog. He obviously didn't like Colonel Smith's new attitude toward River. It gave Zoe an unpleasant feeling her own self.

They went over the revised plan again, and the meeting adjourned. Dr. Williams, the weasel, stole one last glance at River as he left. River caught Zoe glaring at the sad little man and rolled her eyes, as if to say, "It's so tough being a celebrity."

The Colonel motioned for Jordan Cobb to follow him out, but the younger man held up a hand and nodded towards Jayne. Smith shrugged and left the kitchen. Sensing a family moment fast approaching, the crew abandoned the kitchen.

Zoe went up to the bridge to think. Looking out at the base, it was hard to imagine that it had all been founded on a lie. All the people the Underground had recruited. All the work and lives it had taken them to create this structure hidden and closed off from the rest of the population. It was all based on the supposition that they could take on the Alliance where they lived. But really it was all about that Academy. A tower full of weapons the Browncoats could use to destroy the Alliance once and for all. Zoe wondered how many of the recruits knew that they had signed up to be nothing more than weapons dealers.

"It's Zoe, right?" a voice asked from behind her.

Turning around, Zoe got her first good look at Jordan Cobb. It was amazing how much he looked like Jayne. He was just as tall, if not an inch or two taller. Jordan had the same blue eyes and rough features as Jayne, but he had less bulk to his muscles, like he spent more time running than lifting weights. Jordan was also clean-shaven, and his hair was a few inches longer. There was also a more comical side to Jordan, it seemed. Zoe had seen amusement in his eyes several times during the meeting with Colonel Smith, like he found comedy even in this very serious situation.

Which didn't remind Zoe of anyone at all.

"You need something, Cobb?" she asked.

Jordan shrugged. "Just wanted to meet you is all." He stuck out his hand. "And you can just call me Jordan." He smiled and stopped looking so much like Jayne.

Zoe shook his hand but didn't return the smile. It just seemed too strange. "How'd you end up in Khonsu City, Cobb?" she asked. "Seems a mighty big coincidence you and Jayne would be here at the same time."

"Yeah, bit suspicious, ain't it?" Jordan asked, giving a small laugh.

Zoe was taken aback. "I didn't mean - "

"Yes, you did," Jordan said, waving a dismissive hand. "It's okay. I'd be a bit wary my own self. Especially with what they've got y'all doin'." Zoe didn't respond. "No, well, they've got me here 'cause I'm the best at what I do."

"Sniper," Zoe recalled.

Jordan nodded. "Got me a good pair of eyes, so they tell me." He shrugged. "Joining the Browncoats seemed like the thing to do at the time."

"You weren't needed back home?" Zoe asked. From what she knew of the Cobb family, family was always first. Jayne had only left because he had to.

Jordan shook his head and looked away. "Had nothing left on Achilles," he said. There was an awkward moment of silence. "My, uh, my wife died," he said, voice unsteady for the first time.

"You don't have to - "

"Nah, it's okay," Jordan said. "She was from the mountains, right, and her people hated me. Loathed me with a passion, actually. Well, they hated everyone from the Heel. Anyway, we got married without their permission, 'course, and then her folk found out she was pregnant. They came one night and took her back. Knocked me around pretty good. Woke up a week later. Didn't find out for months that she'd died in childbirth. Our daughter, too." Jordan took a breath.

Zoe didn't know what to say, so she didn't say anything. After a moment, Jordan said, "Anyway, after that, well, I just couldn't stay on Achilles. Wanted to kill someone so badly didn't figure it'd matter much who was on the receivin' end. So, I joined the Browncoats, got real good at shootin' people, and ended up here.

Finally, after another few moments of awkward silence, Zoe said, "I'm sorry."

Jordan nodded. "I believe you."

Zoe shook her head. "Was there something you needed from me?" she asked, hoping that Jordan's point was not just to tell her about his past.

Jordan looked down the corridor, making sure there was no one else around. He didn't realize it didn't matter; River was always listening. "From Jayne's letters, you sound like the level-headed, intelligent one in the group," he said.

"And?"

"And, I just figured you'd be the one who'd actual listen to me. Jayne's just been ignorin' me." Jordan stopped short. Zoe just kept looking at him, waiting for him to reach his point. "I need you to help me keep Jayne from doing anythin' stupid."

"That'll be a might difficult," Zoe said. "Think I'll have to tie him down or drug him or somethin'," she continued.

Jordan smiled. "Can practically see the wheels in his head going 'round. And he ain't tellin' me a damned thing."

"Maybe he thinks you'd just try to talk him out of it," Zoe offered.

"Or maybe he thinks he's protecting me 'cause he knows I'm with him, whatever gorram stupid thing he's doin'," Jordan looked right at her. It felt to Zoe like he knew exactly what was going on. That didn't sit well with her. "Anyway, worth I shot, I guess."

He looked so worried for his brother, Zoe almost told him the truth. That would have been a damned stupid thing to do.

"Well, if I can't stop Jayne, I'll help him," Zoe promised. "How's that?"

Jordan laughed. "I guess it'll have to do." He gave her a smile. "Thanks, Zoe. I knew you were the smart one." He threw her a little wink before turning and leaving the bridge.

Watching him go, Zoe couldn't help but wonder whether he would side with the Underground or with Serenity in the end. He was a difficult one to read. Besides that, something about him made Zoe uncomfortable. She didn't know what. But something.

"Was that Jordan Cobb?" Mal asked, coming onto the bridge.

"It was."

"What do you make of him?"

"He bothers me," Zoe said honestly.

Mal looked surprised. He recovered quickly, commenting, "Bet the fact he looks just like Jayne don't help much."

"He's nothing like Jayne," Zoe muttered.

"You and Kaylee ready to roll?" Mal asked, changing the subject. That meant he was uncomfortable with the current line of conversation. Zoe didn't quite understand why, but since she didn't want to talk about Jordan Cobb anymore, she let it slide.

"Yes, Sir. Just waitin' for first light."

"Good. All according to plan," Mal said.

"It's a first, Captain," Zoe commented.

"We don't have much of a track record with plans, do we, Zoe?"

"Not at all, Sir."

"You're still with me on this, right?"

Zoe looked at him. She hadn't seen Mal this worried in a long time. If ever. "What makes you ask that, Sir?"

"I heard Jayne was tryin' to get you to talk me outta this."

"Try being the right word, Captain," Zoe said.

"Truthful, Zoe. We gonna be able to do this?" Mal asked.

Zoe thought a moment. "I ain't gonna lie, Sir. It's bound to be tricky. But the lack of sanity associated with our plans has never stopped us before. Be a shame to let it start bein' a factor now, so late in our careers and all."

Mal nodded, gave a little chuckle, and took a seat on the bridge. "Go get some rest, Zoe. Got a packed morning ahead of us." Zoe nodded and left him there to think. Knowing Mal, he'd sleep in that chair tonight.

Early the next morning, Kaylee and Zoe snuck onto the Alliance transport ship. They had about half an hour to do their thing and get back to Serenity before the Browncoats moved the ships.

They made their way to the engine room, where Kaylee shook her head and pointed out flaw after flaw to Zoe. Finally, Zoe had to remind her, "Timer contraption, Kaylee."

"Right," Kaylee said, yanking open the engine access panels.

"Tell me again how this thing is going to work?" Zoe asked, handing Kaylee the contraption she'd been working on the last two days.

"It's a timed mechanism that'll gum up their workin's real good just when we want them to," Kaylee said. "'Member what Safron did so we'd miss the Lassiter rendezvous?" Zoe nodded. "Like that, only better. 'Cause it's me doing it," Kaylee said with a smile.

She pulled several wires and pieces out of the works, placed her new contraption inside and put it all back together again. "That'll hump 'em right good just about the time they're supposed to head out to meet us."

"And not before," Zoe said.

Kaylee nodded, "And not before."

"Right then, let's get back to Serenity 'fore they start movin' her outta here." When Zoe turned back to leave the engine room, however, a figure stood in the doorway. "Cobb," she blurted out.

Kaylee stood by, a look of terror and shock on her face. This was not good.

Jordan nodded towards the engine, "She meet your standards?"

Kaylee faltered, "Um, yeah. Wouldn't, uh, wouldn't choose her for my own self, but she'll do." Jordan Cobb nodded again. Kaylee took a deep breath, "Well, I better be gettin' back. You comin', Zoe?"

"I'll be right there, Kaylee," Zoe answered.

Kaylee looked from Jordan to Zoe and back again, quickly maneuvering around Jordan and towards the exit.

When they were alone, Jordan said, "I don't want to know what you're doing, Zoe." His voice was colder than it had been on the bridge. He was also looking right at her. He didn't need her to tell him. Zoe was sure he'd seen and heard everything. Jordan shook his head. "One day I'll figure out why people don't trust me enough to let me in on their moonbrained schemes."

Zoe kept his gaze. "Maybe one day you'll earn that trust."

Jordan nodded. "Fair enough. But I stand by my previous point, Zoe. I'm with Jayne no matter what idiot thing he's got in his head. That sentiment extends to his crew," he said. He hadn't taken his eyes off of her.

"You can't come with us now, you know," she said.

Jordan smiled and the tension in the room relaxed. "Don't particularly wanna," he said. "And, besides. I come with you now, after that cold reception Jayne gave me yesterday, even an idiot like Smith is bound to be suspicious."

Zoe nodded, "Glad we're in agreement."

"Well, good luck," Jordan said, moving aside as Zoe passed. "You'll probably need it."

Zoe gave him a quick smile before running off towards Serenity. Jordan Cobb wasn't a mystery anymore. He was as moonbrained as his brother, and about ten times smarter.


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter Ten

"I'll see you soon," Simon said, reluctantly pulling out of Kaylee's arms. He didn't like leaving her. It was little consolation that Mal didn't particularly like this part of the plan either, not when the Captain still wouldn't do anything about it. Simon tried to tell himself that there was nothing for it, but all he wanted to do was stay with Kaylee and keep her safe.

Kaylee nodded and looked away. Tears were forming in her eyes. Simon tried to tell himself it was the hormones reacting, but he couldn't quite convince himself. If one little thing went wrong, he'd never see her again. "Good luck," she said.

Silently, Simon added, "We're going to need it." He nodded back, gave her hand a final squeeze, then followed Zoe and Jayne out of the ship. River gave the ship one final loving pat as she, too, left the safety of Serenity.

Simon turned to see Mal giving Inara some last minute advice on the catwalk.

"Sir, we've got a schedule to keep to," Zoe called.

"Just a minute!" Mal yelled back. Simon couldn't hear what exactly he was telling Inara, but he saw Inara shaking her head and trying to usher Mal towards the steps. Mal put both hands on Inara's shoulders, looked her right in the eyes, said a few more words, then abruptly let her go again. Then Mal turned and rushed down the steps and out the door. "What're we waiting for? Let's get a move on!" he yelled as he took the lead.

"Shoulda told her ages ago, Captain," River sing-songed after him.

"Better late than never, I expect," Mal muttered back.

"Don't think Williams will be apt to agree with you on that point, Sir," Zoe said under her breath.

As they walked down the streets of Khonsu City, Simon couldn't help but feel glad and relieved that they would soon be leaving this god-awful place. Nothing was as it seemed here. There was no such thing as simple folk in Khonsu City. It made Simon for once long for the black. It was quiet out there. Relatively speaking.

Simon just hoped that this time, just this one time, everything would go according to plan. It was at least starting out that way. So far, so good.

River looked at Simon and commented, "Thought the man who leapt off a cliff wearing home-made wings."

"What?" Mal and Simon asked at the same time.

"So far, so good. So far, so good. So far, so good - "

"Splat," Jayne muttered.

Williams was waiting for them in an alley a block away from the Tower of Khonsu. He was nervously pacing up and down the dirty alleyway, and breathed a sigh of relief when he saw the crew approaching. On closer inspection, it was apparent the doctor was sweating profusely. Simon half expected the man to keel over any second from a heart attack.

That would have put a slight wrinkle in the plan. The least the weasel could do was wait until he got the crew inside before dying on them.

"Here's your, your keycard," Williams said between breaths. He sounded like he was running a marathon. "For the side door," he continued. "I'll go in, make sure the hall's clear, then signal you the all clear," he stammered, handing Mal the security card.

_"Keys change every morning, but the service entrance on the side here is basically unguarded," Williams said, pointing to the blueprint._

_"It's the door for the people who want to remain invisible," River whispered._

_"Sounds like our kind of door," Mal muttered. The rest of the crew nodded in agreement. _

In the planning stages, Williams had seemed so calm and collected about the whole thing. Now that they were actually doing it, it seemed he had lost his nerve.

Williams gave them a final nod of approval before running off down the alley towards the main street.

"If there's any trouble, guess we know what he's going to do," Jayne muttered, gaping after him. River put a hand on his arm. Simon tried not to notice.

"Last chance to back out," Mal said, examining the key. Everyone was silent, though Jayne was looking hopefully at the rest of the group. "Shiny. Let's go be good guys."

Mal led the way back down the alley to the hidden side door. There was a red light centered above the doorway. They stood there waiting a few minutes, staring at the light. Simon didn't like waiting around. From the looks on the faces of the rest of the crew, they shared his feelings. The light started blinking. Mal swiped the card. Nothing happened.

"Flip it over, Captain," River muttered.

Mal shot a look at her. He flipped the card the other way and swiped again. The light turned green, and he pushed open the door. The crew slipped into the building and met Williams again.

Now came the fun part.

_"And how do you expect us to move about as we please once we in this gorram tower?" Jayne asked, glaring at Williams from across the table._

_"Sleeping powder," Williams said, holding up a canister. "We can rig it to the air vents."_

_"You mean _we_ can rig it to the air vents," River said, taking the canister._

_"Once circulating, it will take effect almost immediately. Knock everyone out. It'll wear off naturally in six hours, but we can use the smelling salts on the kids. Within five minutes, the gas will clear, and we'll have the run of the place," he said, handing River another canister._

_"Don't mix those up, now," Mal warned. River stuck her tongue out at him._

"Masks on," Zoe said, handing Williams his.

_River studied the mask intently for a few moments before saying to Mal, "They're very easily suited to our unsavory purpose."_

_"And that means what, exactly?"_

_"Williams will go to sleep, too," River said, flipping a switch on the side of the mask she was holding. _

_"Awe," Jayne said glumly, "I was looking forward to knocking that weasel out."_

There was a long hiss as River put the canister of sleeping powder to the air vent.

"How will we know when it's working?" Jayne asked.

Williams fell to the floor.

"Oh," Jayne muttered, reaching to take his mask off.

Simon held up his hand and checked his watch. "A couple minutes yet."

"Let's start moving," Mal said, taking lead along the narrow corridor.

_"We'll come along he corridor this way," Williams explained, pointing out the path on the blueprints. "Then we'll take a left into the main corridor and head for the elevator banks."_

Mal led them quickly and silently through the halls and to the elevators. When the doors pinged open for them, they found the elevator was already occupied by a handful of staff. They dragged the doctor and nurses from the car. Jayne gave the security guard a swift kick just for good measure as he threw the unconscious lug into the corridor.

"Was that necessary?" Simon asked.

"It was for luck," Jayne said, storming into the elevator.

"For luck?" Simon repeated.

"He also has a rabbit's foot in his back pocket," River said, giving Simon a look as the rest of the crew piled into the elevator.

"A rabbit's foot, Jayne?" Zoe asked.

"Never knew you had a superstitious side, Jayne," Mal muttered as the doors closed.

"Hell, Mal, we gonna need all the luck we can get ahold of for this gorram mission," Jayne answered. Simon looked at the mercenary in bewilderment. River just smiled and shook her head. Mal pressed the button for the sixty-sixth floor. As the doors pinged open again, Jayne nodded and repeated, "Yup. Like I done said. Needin' all the luck we can get." To River, he added, "Told ya we shoulda looked harder for a garlic necklace."

"They aren't vampires, Jayne," Zoe said.

"Couldn'ta hurt none," Jayne muttered back.

Simon surveyed the corridor in front of them in wonder. It looked like a college dormitory floor, except with a lot more security. There were three guards sprawled out near the entrance and three other staff members collapsed over an information desk. To their left was a common room where two students sat with books in their hands, looking like they'd just fallen asleep while reading. They couldn't have been more than fifteen years old.

"Gem and Eye," River said, nodding to the boy and girl. "The twins."

_"How many students are there in the Academy?" Simon asked._

_Williams hedged the question by describing their ages again._

_"Dr. Williams. How many are we lifting out of there?" Mal asked more forcefully._

_"There are thirteen."_

_"Mighty big tower for only thirteen students."_

_"They are only the current class," Williams explained. "Our work is not about quantity, Mr. Cobb. It is about quality."_

_"Current class? Where are the graduates?"_

_Williams ignored the question._

"Simon," Mal said, snapping the doctor out of his memories. "Go do your computer thing." The captain nodded at the information desk. "Plug in your program and let's get moving."

"Best idea ever," Jayne muttered, glancing around. "Don't like this place."

Simon didn't care for it either. With all the sleeping people around, the compound bore a strange similarity to Miranda. Simon ran over the to computer terminals and started working. He pulled a memory chip from his pocket and inserted it into the console. A few keystrokes later, Simon was confident his program would get the students to follow him out of the Academy. Once the crew woke them up, that is to say.

Simon took this opportunity to copy all the information that he could find on the students' programming to the memory chip, hoping the information would later lead to his breaking the code for good.

Williams had been vague and elusive in answering Simon's questions, and although River knew probably everything he needed to know, his little sister wasn't telling. A few seconds later, Simon realized why.

The programming was all that was there. Without what the Alliance had hard-wired into the students' brains, they would have no memory, no personality, and no ability to form either of those. Even their short term memories were shot to hell. The Alliance hadn't just brainwashed these kids; they'd wiped them clean. There wouldn't even be a hint as to who they were before the Academy.

Simon could write programming to override the default blank-slate, and with River's help, he could probably make it a pretty good imitation, but he couldn't give these kids back their lives. None of them could. It would always be the programming doing the talking. They would always be little more than robots.

"Simon," River said softly.

He looked up. He hadn't realized how long he'd been standing there. Mal was especially looking worried. Everyone else had removed their gas masks.

"We've got to get them out of here," she said, handing him a packet of smelling salts.

"Yeah, right," Simon muttered, taking the medicine and removing his mask. He took a few deep breaths, and then the crew got to work.

They started with the twins who'd been reading Alliance literature on serving your government and your duty as a citizen. Simon's programming had taken a few seconds to filter into their brains from the network, but they followed the crew without much trouble, and even helped them find the other students.

Aries and Taurus were the oldest boys, each about nineteen. Libra was the oldest girl at twenty. They had take-charge attitudes that Simon hadn't counted upon.

"Hard-wired to be the alphas of any situation," River said under her breath. Simon gave River a confused look. Apparently his programming hadn't been that good, after all. Simon could only guess that there was an underlying program as a default for the students' personalities. They were probably the baseline for all the other codes that programmers wrote for them. Simon's apparently hadn't been detailed enough to completely override the defaults. That gave Simon some uneasiness. If the kids were still exhibiting traits the Alliance had put into their minds, they might be in trouble.

_Splat_.

"We need to move quickly, Simon," River reminded him.

Simon didn't argue. The crew sped through the remaining rooms. Cancer, Leo, Virgo, Scorpio, Sagittarius, Capricorn, Aquarius, and Pisces. Code names. They were the only names the kids had, and they were stuck with them, like they were stuck with everything the Alliance had given them.

They piled back into the elevator to go up the remaining forty floors to the roof.

"Where are we going?" Pisces, the youngest one, barely thirteen by the looks of him, asked.

"We're leaving," Simon said.

"Ohhh," Pisces said slowly. "Why?"

Simon blinked at him.

"Naturally inquisitive. You would have given them a run for their money," River muttered. The elevator abruptly stopped before the boy could ask what she meant by that. The doors slid open.

"What in the hell?" Jayne asked.

"The elevator doesn't go up to the roof," Gem said.

"We aren't allowed on the roof," Eye finished for her brother.

Mal and Zoe exchanged a look. Simon knew what they were thinking. Williams hadn't said anything about this.

"I'm gonna kill that gorram bastard," Jayne said.

"Now, honey," River muttered, "What have we talked about in regards to killing in blind rage?"

"That it's a healthy outlet for my frustration?" Jayne guessed.

"Enough," Mal said more calmly than he probably felt. "Everyone out. I suppose the stairs go up to the roof?" he asked the twins.

"But we aren't allowed on the roof," Eye repeated as one of the others said, "Yes, Sir."

They marched out of the elevator and immediately came to a long, strange corridor. It immediately branched out in three directions. Mal looked at River. River shrugged. Mal looked at Libra.

Libra pointed to the left.

River and Jayne led the way. They weren't five steps in when an alarm started sounding. A glass wall suddenly slid down, cutting River and Jayne off from the rest of the group. Simon rushed forward. River was obviously yelling to them as Jayne pounded on the glass, but it was no good. When Jayne got out his gun, River pushed his arm back down, shaking her head. She looked back at Simon, who stood there in shock, just watching. River pointed to her left, Simon's right. She caught Simon's eyes and mouthed, "Go." Simon shook his head and shrugged. He had no idea which way the stairs were. None of them did. "Cancer," she mouthed.

Simon turned to the girl called Cancer. "Do you know the way out of here?" he asked her.

The girl, who Simon guessed was about sixteen, nodded.

"Will you lead us to the roof?" he asked.

The girl nodded again and began leading the group back the way they came.

Simon looked back at River. She nodded. "Go," she mouthed again. Simon took a deep breath and nodded. Then he locked eyes with Jayne and tried to tell him with his mind to get his baby sister out of this thing alive. Jayne nodded as if he understood. Simon gave River one last look, then turned and ran down the hall with the others. He didn't like having this much faith in Jayne Cobb, but Simon knew the man-ape would die before letting anyone hurt River. That had to be good enough for now.


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter Eleven

Jayne watched the crew vanish around the corner and wondered how in hell he was going to get River out of this mess alive.

River stopped her inspection of the glass wall to look at him. Jayne thought maybe she was going to comment on his protective instincts, but all she said was, "We should move on. We aren't going to be able to get through this way."

"Blasting it - " Jayne lifted his gun again.

"Won't work, Jayne," River repeated. "Like I told you before. You'll just end up accidentally blowing yourself up and winning a Darwin award."

"A what?"

"Just prove you aren't a man-ape gone wrong and follow me," River suggested, taking the lead.

"Why the hell did that gorram Libra girl point us in the wrong gorram direction?" Jayne asked angrily as they started walking down the eerily empty corridor.

"I don't think it's technically the wrong direction," River said. "Simon's programming should have made them tell the truth."

"So, you're saying there's an exit this way?" Jayne asked.

River stopped and closed her eyes a moment. Jayne didn't understand why.

"Brain is very crowded," she said as she started again.

Suddenly Jayne remembered Ariel and how River had led them out without any blueprints or weasels on the inside helping them out.

"That was a long time ago, Jayne. Could hear the Captain and saw the exit through the guards," River said. "And also, brain was a lot less crowded back then."

Jayne didn't see how that bit made a lick of sense. She'd been a hellova lot more crazy back then.

"Shut up," River muttered, moving more quickly now. Within a few seconds, she'd broken into a run. "Something's up this way!" she yelled.

Jayne ran after her. They turned left down a side corridor, right at the next one, and right after that, but soon Jayne had no idea where they'd come from, much less where they were headed. There were just too many gorram corridors. Too many gorram turns. He only hoped River had some kind of plan. They were lost, as far as Jayne was concerned. And sooner or later they would be found. And Jayne didn't think he had enough ammo to take down the Tower of Khonsu on his own.

Finally, River slid to a stop after taking a right turn. A second later, Jayne almost ran right into her.

Standing at the other end of the long hallway stood three teenaged girls. Behind them there was a door.

_Well_, Jayne thought, _at least this corridor isn't empty._

The girls looked strange. They stood perfectly still, just watching River and Jayne, but their eyes were empty. They looked ready to pounce on them at any moment. The expressions on their faces were so tight and drawn that for a second Jayne expected to suddenly burst into flames from the intensity of it. It was like looking into the barrel of a rocket launcher. Times six.

Jayne had only seen that level of calm-damaging intensity on one other person. He counted himself incredibly lucky that _that_ moonbrain was now on _his_ side.

"The big one thinks more than we expected," a voice said over the intercom system.

"He likes to surprise people," River said simply, looking straight ahead. The empty eyes of the three girls focused on her.

"And you like to be surprised," the voice said.

"Who the hell are you?" Jayne asked.

"We are the Graces," the voice answered.

Then Jayne realized it wasn't one voice. There were actually multiple voices speaking in unison over the intercom. He looked from the wall speaker to the teenage girls. "Why don't you talk for your own selves?"

"We are the Graces. We speak as one. Our voices are one. Our minds are one."

"Well, that's just damned ridiculous," Jayne said.

"They're not quite right," River said slowly.

"I hadn't figured that one out yet, thanks, sweetheart," Jayne said sarcastically.

"What I mean is - "

"River Tam had Grace. We were made like her. Without her faults."

Jayne laughed. "You got her biggest fault by the shit ton," he said. "Y'all are the craziest folks I've ever met. And I've met me some crazies in my time."

The Graces looked at him. "Yes. You have," they said. "No more witches. No more secrets getting out. No more River Tams."

"What in the hell does that mean?" Jayne asked.

"I don't think they're - " River said in awe.

"We are the Graces," the voices interrupted. Apparently they didn't want Jayne to know what River thought they were.

"Yeah," Jayne muttered. "That's just gorram creepy." He glanced nervously again from the coms to the girls. "Don't suppose y'all are gonna just let us pass?"

"Where would the fun be in that?" the voices asked.

"But you can't even have any fun!" River shouted.

"Nor can we hurt. Nor can we be destroyed. We are perfection, River Tam. You could be perfect, too."

"Hold up," Jayne said, raising his hand. "There were only _three_ graces. Sounds to me like you ain't got any opening's in your little club."

The Graces tilted their heads at him in unison.

"Yes, there's more stored in this brain than women and how to kill people," Jayne muttered. "Try not to act too surprised by it. Hurtin' my feelings."

"River Tam will be destroyed. River Tam will be remade. River Tam will become Hecate. And she will be perfect."

"Who now?" Jayne asked.

"Goddess of witchcraft," River said.

"And the dark of the moon," the voices added. "We thought you would like that, Jayne Cobb. Your River Tam will become _our_ moonbrain."

"Over my dead body," Jayne said, raising his gun.

"We thought you would say that. Your death will help our cause immensely."

Jayne was sick of this. He started firing.

The Graces laughed eerily over the loudspeaker as they dodged his bullets. It was like they were flying out of the way, moving so fast Jayne couldn't figure out how they were doing it. He hadn't even seen River move that fast. Jayne's first gun ran out of bullets. He threw it down, took out his next one, and kept firing.

It wasn't doing any good.

"Dodge this!" River yelled, pulling out her laser pistol. The blast hit one of the Graces in the shoulder. River continued to fire, but that first shot was the only one that hit home.

"What in the hell?" Jayne yelled angrily, reloading again. "Stay still so I can shoot you!"

"Jayne! Wait!" River yelled suddenly.

"Why?" Jayne asked, but he kept firing, until River forced his arm down.

"Because you are going to need those last two bullets, Jayne Cobb," the voices said.

Jayne looked at River. She was staring at the pistol in her hand. "Needs charged."

"We're out of ammo," Jayne realized aloud.

The Graces smiled. It was kind of a dead smile, in Jayne's opinion. Unsettling.

"You will help us destroy River Tam now, Jayne Cobb. This has been very fun. If you were going to live through the day, we would say better luck next time."

Jayne threw down his gun and pulled out his knife. "Well, come on, then! Why don't you just attack us and get this over with?"

"We don't think you want the death we would hand you," the Graces said.

A buzzing began over the com system. It made Jayne's ears feel funny.

"No! Stop!" River screamed, throwing her hands over her ears.

"No?" the Graces asked. The buzzing stopped. "We told you so. Now, then, River. The Alliance orders you to kill Jayne Cobb."

"What?" Jayne asked.

River's body went rigid. She stood up straight and looked at Jayne. He knew that look. That was the berserk look.

"You'll be wanting to pick up your gun now, Jayne. We hope we can call you Jayne."

"Piss off," Jayne muttered.

"As you wish," the Graces said. Then the girls took off through the door.

River was still staring at him. Jayne didn't move. He considered going for his gun.

No sooner had that thought crossed his mind than he found himself flying through the air and slamming into the wall.

"Gorramit, girl!" he screamed. He dropped the knife and charged at River. She flipped herself over him and sent him slamming into the opposite wall. Jayne was dizzy for a few moments, and he was pretty sure he'd be feeling that the next day. If he made it to the next day, that is. River kicked him. He grabbed her leg and flung her backwards. She tumbled over with grace then swung her leg out, tripping him. He rolled away before she could kick him again and threw himself up from the floor. He barely blocked her next punch. But he did block it.

That struck Jayne as a good thing. Maybe River was holding back.

A punch landed right in his jaw.

Okay, maybe River was trying to hold back. Maybe she was fighting this. Jayne shoved her away. Maybe he could help her.

"River!" he yelled, grabbing her arm.

She kicked him in the head. He didn't know how she'd managed that one.

"Gorramit, River! It's me!"

Her knee made contact with his gut. He picked her up and rammed into the wall, holding her hands above her head.

"I thought we were past all this," he growled.

She wrapped her legs around his waist and began to squeeze.

"Hey! Let go!" Jayne yelled. He spun around, trying to throw her off of him. He made the mistake of loosening his grip on her wrists.

River got her hands free and started beating at him.

"River! I love you, but if you don't gorram stop this I'm gonna have to kick your ass!"

River loosened her grip for just a moment. It was enough for Jayne to get her off of him. She rolled across the floor, picking up something shiny as she did. Jayne's own gorram knife.

Jayne looked around for something to defend himself with, then lunged for his gun. He landed hard on the ground and turned, quickly pointing his weapon. River was already standing above him, holding his knife, looking ready to gut him.

Only it wasn't River. It was the weapon. And there was only one way to stop it. He almost convinced himself of that. River wasn't in. He'd have to try back later.

"Shoot her, Jayne. Didn't you say once that someone would have to put a bullet to her? Now you get to prove yourself right." The voices were back over the coms, but the Graces themselves were nowhere to be seen.

What the hell was River waiting for? Jayne didn't get it.

"Kill or be killed, Jayne. You understand that concept, we trust."

"I understand a hell of a lot more than that, you gorram voiceless freaks," Jayne screamed. He looked River in the eye. "River," he said slowly. "Eta kuram na smekh."

River collapsed to the floor.

Jayne rose slowly, put his knife and gun away, and gathered River in his arms. Then he ran for it, flying through the door and up the stairs, and crashing onto the roof, where a firefight had started between Serenity's crew and Smith's Browncoats who had apparently fixed whatever Kaylee had done to their ship.

Mal and Zoe were holding them off. Jayne ran River into the hold and nearly threw her into Simon's arms.

"Took you long enough, Jayne!" Mal yelled.

"Is she all right?" Simon asked, taking River.

"Just sleeping, Doc," Jayne said. Simon gave him a confused look, but Jayne didn't have time to explain.

Mal yelled for Inara to take off. He and Zoe backed into the hold as Jayne fired his last two shots at the Browncoats.

"Cobb! Take the shot! Kill him!" Smith yelled into his radio.

Jayne saw Jordan, sniper rifle in hand, atop a nearby building. Jayne had no way of knowing who Jordan had in his sights.

"Kill him!" Smith yelled again. A second later, he was on the ground, a big gaping hole where his knee should have been. Jayne saw Jordan give him a little wave before the door started to close.

"What just happened?" Mal asked when they finally went airborne.

"Damned if I know, Mal," Jayne said, turning back to River. "She _is_ going to be okay, right?" he asked. Simon looked her over again before nodding. Jayne heard Mal say something about their passengers being safe and snug in the common room, but Jayne couldn't have cared less. He took River in his arms again and carried her to his bunk.


	12. Chapter 12

**Author's Note: **I just want to thank everyone for their patience, support, and wonderful comments with "Moonbrains." I am truly sorry it has taken me this long to finish this story. I hope you all enjoy it, and I will be looking forward to your comments!

* * *

Chapter Twelve

It was chaos. A beautiful, colorful chaos of voices and thoughts and emotions. She could hear and see and feel everything for miles. And she was at the center, watching the random shapes of human nature drift around her, an observer of the wide beautiful and sometimes terrible 'verse. Then she became a woman and fell in love and became part of the chaos. It invited her to dance, and she couldn't resist the temptations of those blue orbs or those sold, protective arms, or that loyal and surprisingly brilliant soul. She wasn't watching anymore. The thoughts and feelings belonged to her now. The voice in her head was hers. She was human. She was chaos.

But then a switch was flipped. The chaos disappeared and the beautiful, colorful, terrible 'verse faded abruptly to black. The voices stopped. Even her voice was silenced. And there was only one thing left in her sliced and diced moonbrain.

Kill Jayne Cobb.

Everything was dark, except for him. She didn't want to hurt him, but she leapt at him anyway. She wasn't the woman anymore. She was the weapon.

"River, I love you."

His voice seemed to bounce around in her mind, but she couldn't stop. Why didn't he kill her? If anyone ever could, it would be him.

When he spoke again, he too went dark.

"River, I love you."

When River woke up, the beautiful chaos was back. She was laying in Jayne's bed, an old quilt made by Mamma covering her up. The room was dark, but not empty. Jayne was asleep in a chair beside the bed. The dirty laundry that usually occupied this piece of furniture was scattered across the floor. There was a path across the room that had been created while River slept and Jayne paced. River watched him sleeping. He wasn't dreaming. River wondered how long she'd been asleep.

Jayne jerked awake suddenly and saw her watching him. "River!" he cried, jumping out of the chair and onto the side of the bed. "Are you all right?"

His emotions and jumbled, worried thoughts hit her brainpan like a sledge hammer. He'd been so worried about her. Was she going to be herself when she woke up? Would she remember any of it? Would she forgive him for fighting her, thinking he would have to kill her?

She was the one who'd gone bat shit crazy and tried to kill him. Again. And he wanted her to forgive him?

River started crying. It was too much. He should have killed her. One day it would have to happen. They were going to keep finding her and flipping the switch in her brain. Until she killed him. Until she killed everyone she loved and had nowhere to go but back to the Alliance.

"Oh," Jayne mumbled some Chinese. "I'll go get Simon. Maybe he'll know - "

As he moved to get up, River threw her arms around him. He changed his mind about getting Simon as he wrapped his arms around her and held her. She was safe now. He'd protect her. They'd never get to her again. If he had to kill every last one of those gorram bastards himself. Nobody could make his woman their weapon.

"I love you, too, Jayne," River said after a few seconds.

"You heard that, huh?" Jayne asked.

River nodded into his shoulder. "Gorram right I did, Jayne Cobb. And you can bet your bright orange hat I'm never gonna let you forget it was you who said it first."

Jayne laughed and pulled away to look her in the eye. "Truth be told, I think I can live with them terms." He gave her a quick kiss before asking, "You sure you don't want me to go get Simon?"

"I just need you, Jayne," River said, kissing him, losing herself in the chaos. She had faith in Jayne's word. They'd never get to her again. They were safe.

Later, as River cuddled in close to Jayne, she asked, "We're headed towards Haven then?"

"Yeah, Mal seems to think the further out in the black the better."

"Not a bad notion," River said. "'Cept for the part where a lot of folk know we're partial to that rock."

"Well, now you're awake, you can tell the cap what a gorram idiot he's being."

"I take it he didn't listen to you when you told him?"

"Hell no. Mal ain't never gonna listen to me about nothin'."

"Probably true," River muttered. Then she got up the courage to ask him what she'd been wondering since she woke up. "Jayne?"

"Yeah, River?"

"Why didn't you just shoot me?"

"'Cause I ain't as dumb as I seem," Jayne said. "That's 'xactly what those Grace bitches wanted me to do. Kill you then kill myself."

"How do you figure that?" River asked. "I didn't even know what they were after. It was like they didn't have minds to read."

Jayne shrugged. "They said I'd need those two bullets. One," he pointed at River. "Two." He pointed to himself. "I couldn't give them what they wanted. Besides, no matter how moonbrained you go, River Tam, I ain't never gonna be able to kill you."

River kissed him again.

"Don't you figure we should tell the others you're awake and back to normal?" Jayne asked.

"They can wait a few more hours," River said, climbing on top of Jayne. He gave her his naughty smile and pulled her down towards him so he could kiss her some more. His mind filled with wonderful and brilliant ideas for what they could do with each other for a couple more hours. They would be far too busy to give the rest of the crew a second thought.

Around the kitchen table, everyone had gone silent. Except to River, of course. She heard every confused and worried thought coming from every one of their brains. Simon was still trying to figure out how to, and if he should, erase the default programming the Alliance had set in place. Kaylee was worried about what would happen if the Browncoat Underground or the Alliance caught up with them. Zoe and Mal were both trying to figure a way out of this mess. Jayne wanted to kill the Graces. Oh, and make sure his brother was all right after shooting the crazy Browncoat Colonel. Inara was growing impatient with Mal. Again. No big change there.

Beyond the kitchen, River knew there was silence. The students were sleeping, and they didn't dream. The Alphas, as Mal was thinking of them, had nearly demanded their own rooms. The captain blamed Simon for the annoying programming, but he gave the older kids their own bunks anyway. The rest of the kids were camped out in the hold. Not that they could stay there forever.

That was the rub.

"What we have ourselves here," Mal said at length. "Is a gorram conundrum of incredibly proportions." The crew waited for him to go on. "We knew this part wouldn't be easy - "

"I believe the word I used was suicide," Jayne grumbled.

"And given recent developments regarding some of us overestimating our abilities regarding computer programming - "

"Also known as underestimating the Alliance's abilities to make an impenetrable default layer that can only be overwritten by the most detailed computer programs in the 'verse," Simon interjected.

"We've got to face the fact that these kids are safer with us," Mal finally finished his thought.

"You can't keep them in the hold forever, Mal!" Inara exclaimed.

"What happened to separatin' 'em among our Browncoat friends?" Jayne asked.

"You do recall who it is we stole them from, right, Jayne?" Zoe asked.

"Now, to be fair," Mal said, holding up a hand for everyone to stop. "We still got us a few friends out there. People I'd trust not to take advantage of these kids. But fact is they're just too dangerous. Too unpredictable. For now. 'Sidewhich, what was true for river and Simon is true for them."

"They're safer on the run than hiding out, just waiting to be found," River said.

"For now," Mal repeated after a few moments of Inara's continued evil eye. "Just until Simon and River can figure out some kind of programming that'll help them."

"So, basically, they'll stay in the hold forever," Jayne muttered.

"You don't think we can do it?" Simon asked, offended. Now he was even more determined to write a badass program to override the Alliance controls. Just to prove Jayne wrong.

Jayne shrugged and said calmly, "I just seen Alliance programming in action. And I don't think you're ever gonna be rid of it completely."

He was remembering how River wiped the corridor with him. The whole crew was thinking about River and how Jayne was right. The Alliance would never be completely out of her head.

"Something's been botherin' me," Zoe stated after a couple of seconds.

"Jordan Cobb?" River asked.

"What? No," Zoe said too quickly. "Those Graces Jayne told us about. Who were they?"

"Besides gorram freaks?" Jayne asked.

"Besides that," Zoe confirmed. Everyone looked at River. Except Jayne. She'd already told him her answer.

"I don't know," River said softly.

A ripple of shock moved through the crew.

"But you've got a guess right?" Mal asked.

River shook her head. "I couldn't get a read on them. Not even a blip. It was like they weren't there."

"Holograms?" Simon asked.

"Didn't think those could fight," Mal commented.

"Strictly speaking, Sir, they didn't."

"Holograms ain't that fast, though. Not without defects. 'Specially if the Alliance is behind the design," Kaylee said.

"And three working together in a close space like that would get incredibly complicated," Inara mentioned.

What none of them said out loud was that if they were holograms, surely River would have noticed the equipment.

"I think they were robots," Jayne said suddenly. Everyone stopped and stared at him. Except River, who knew what he was thinking anyway. "Bat shit crazy freakin' robots."

"Robots," Mal said. "Really?"

"Robots don't have that kind of maneuverability, do they?" Simon asked thoughtfully.

"And you would have noticed when you shot that one, right?" Inara asked.

"I noticed we only got one shot," Jayne said gruffly. River coughed. "Okay, that River only got one shot," he corrected. "And we never only get one shot."

"Or no shots, in your case," Zoe said.

"So this is about your pride?" Mal asked.

Jayne leaned forward to counted off the points on his fingers. "They didn't talk. They didn't fight. They didn't think. They moved around, dodging bullets and lasers and tried to get us to kill each other." He pounded the table with his fist. "They weren't gorram human. They weren't gorram holograms."

"So your next guess is _robots_?"

Jayne shrugged, "Maybe some freak in an Alliance think tank has a thing for love bots and decided to repurpose a few."

"I've got no response to that," Mal said, surprised. "Zoe?"

"The Alliance has done stranger things in the past, I suppose."

"It's a theory," River said. "It's all we got. Until they catch up with us."

"Well, hell, then we can just _ask_ them if they're robots," Jayne suggested.

Later River sat on the steps outside the infirmary, listening for signs of movement in the students. They weren't awake yet. They still weren't dreaming. River was beginning to wonder if they'd ever wake up without being told to do so.

"Simon, can I bend yer ear for a sec?" Jayne asked from around the corner, knowcking River out of her own thoughts and into his.

What in the hell was Jayne playing at?

"Um, sure?" Simon responded, distracted. He was studying the students' medical records and didn't want to be bothered, unless it was by Kaylee.

"It's um, it's about River," Jayne said in a rush.

Now he had Simon's full attention. And River's. "Is something wrong?"

"No, Doc. Nuthin' like that," Jayne's mind was reeling. Now he was here, he didn't know how to get the words out. River sat on the edge of the stairs, glad they couldn't see her listening so intently.

"Then - "

"Where I come from a man's supposed to ask permission to marry a woman."

"You're asking me for River's hand in marriage?" Simon asked. He was regretting not killing Jayne when he had the chance.

"Well, kinda. Mostly I'm askin' for yer blessin'. I guess. Don't think you're not giving permission would influence River one way or the other. But it'd be nice iffin you'd - "

"Give you _permission_ to marry my sister." Simon was disgusted. It must have shown on his face.

"At least I'm gonna marry her?" Jayne suggested. In his mind he added _Before I get her gorram knocked up like some prissy-assed gorram idiot I know._

Silence fell for a few moments as Simon thought. He'd gotten Jayne's unspoken meaning. The irony was not lost on the doctor that the man-ape was being more honorable than Simon had been.

"Yes," Simon said softly.

"What?" Jayne asked. He'd been expecting to get chased out of the infirmary by a syringe-wielding mad doctor.

"I give you my permission to ask River to marry you," Simon repeated.

"Try not to look so sick when you say that next time," Jayne suggested.

"You should leave before I change my mind," Simon said. He was hoping River would say no. He was praying for it, actually. _Dear God in heaven, please don't let River be so stupid as to marry the man-ape gone wrong._

Jayne silently left, thinking it was indeed a good idea to leave before Simon thought better of his answer. River quickly moved up the stairs as Jayne went the opposite way, heading for his bunk. She couldn't believe what she'd just heard. Jayne was actually going to ask her to marry him. Simon was going to let him.

How exactly was _she_ the moonbrained one?

"Dr. Simon Tam," Mal said, "Do you promise to take one Kaywinnit Lee Frye as your somewhat lawfully married wife? To have and to hold, more than you already have, for richer or poorer, poorer being the unfortunate constant, in sickness and in health, 'till fiery and tragic death do you part?"

"I do," Simon agreed.

"Kaywinnit Lee Frye - "

"Yes, I do."

There was a round of laughter in their little group, but Mal was offended she'd cut him off. He'd been practicing this in the mirror all week. "You didn't let me finish the vows. You asked me to do this. You oughta let me do this right."

"We're getting married in a cargo hold," Kaylee pointed out.

"My sister got married in a barn," Jayne commented. He was actually hoping he and River could go back and get married on Achilles. He hadn't asked her yet, though. Every time he thought about it, a knot formed in his stomach. River assumed it didn't help that he knew she already knew what he was planning. It seemed to make him even more nervous.

"To be fair, it was a shiny new barn," River said, squeezing his hand. He'd get up the courage eventually. River was almost glad he hadn't asked quite yet. She wasn't sure the crew was ready for River Cobb.

"The point is, this ain't exactly traditional," Kaylee said.

"Just friggin' finish your vows," Mal said.

"I, Kaylee, take you, Simon, as my very lawfully wedded husband. To have and to hold, for richer and poorer, 'till death, which will be a very, very long time coming for both of us, do we part."

"Allrighty. I now pronounce you man and wife. You may now kiss the bride."

Everyone cheered, even Mal, as Simon pulled Kaylee into his arms.

River just stood there a few moments, listening to all the happiness seeping into her brain. She let these thoughts of joy and hope fill her mind, wanting to hang onto them for as long as possible. It wouldn't be like this forever. Eventually, the Browncoat Underground, the Graces, the whole Alliance Army, or any combination thereof, would catch up to them. All hell would break loose. None of them were thinking of that right now. That was in the future. And the future was far, far away. They were living in the now. And now they were flying free. They were together, a family. Nothing, not even two armies and three freaks of nature, could mess that up. Besides, River's crew was probably just moonbrained enough to survive this thing ahead of them.


End file.
